BELIEVE IN YOURSELF, BROTHER!!!! THE "I CAN" PRINCIPLE

0:00 Hey, brothers, my courageous fighting brothers. Face your fears and follow me. We are the sons of the UMP. Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast. The only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, your champions? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP. I really do appreciate you. If this is your first time listening, welcome. My name is Mark Singh. I'm an NLP dating coach. NLP is Neuro Linguistic Programming. And I feel I'm the only dating coach that goes into the inner belief systems to this kind of deep level.

0:50 I believe that your inner belief systems are responsible for not only your success with women, but your success in life in general. And a high tide raises all boats. So if you get improvement with women by working on belief systems such as I'm not enough, I'm unlovable, she'd be better with a different guy rather than me. If you work on those belief systems and rectify them and start believing I am enough, I am a champion, she'd actually be better with me than that other schlep, then you are going to be successful in all areas of your life.

1:22 Not only your relationships, but also financially, your physical fitness, everything else in your life will also get lifted up. And that's why I'm so into this inner game thing. This podcast episode is about the I can principle. And I actually just realized this myself only a couple of weeks ago when I was up against a medical issue. Now, I don't know about you guys, but going to the doctor and having any kind of surgery whatsoever absolutely terrifies me. So I have a situation where the doctor recently told me that I have degenerative spine disease, which basically means the marshmallows, as I'm understanding it, between your spinal cord.

2:02 And if there's any doctors listening, you're laughing at me right now. But like the soft stuff in your spinal cord that goes between the bones has disintegrated, especially in my lower back. I have sciatica, which means part of my left leg is a little bit numb, and I can't really run without it going numb. My back constantly hurts, and I've been procrastinating on getting it fixed. The way it acted up in the first place, which is kind of funny, is I was doing a backflip off a boat.

2:28 I was at some lake party with a bunch of hot chicks, and I was like, oh, dude, I'm going to impress these chicks with my backflip. Did a backflip and like seriously threw out my back, and I've had sciatica ever since. But because I was a fucking pussy, I never got it checked out. I would just do Pilates. I would do stretching, yoga. I would be super into my health myself, but I'd never go to a doctor. Why? Because my dad died when I was 10 years old from diabetes.

2:56 One day the dude was alive, the next day he was dead, and he had an extreme phobia of doctors, which is why he passed away of diabetes. He never got his insulin checked. From what I understand, he went into what's called insulin shock because he was getting the wrong kind of insulin. The next day the dude is dead. So growing up, as I've talked about many times in this podcast, you as well as me wanted to get into rapport with our parents. We do that by taking on some of their bullshit belief systems, and we do that by taking on their phobias.

3:28 Does this relate to you in any way whatsoever where your dad has a phobia of, say, being social, or your mom is socially awkward, or they gave you a belief system that you shouldn't approach people, don't disturb people, and now you're just acting that out. And probably in your case, you have troubles with women. The reason why you have troubles with women, as I always talk about in this podcast, is because of belief systems. Where do those belief systems come from? I talked about this recently as well.

3:55 Your parents. So in my case, I have a phobia of doctors, or I should say I had a phobia of doctors until a recent realization because my father. My father was massively phobic of doctors. There was a story about him where he was the manager of a Coco's. Do you guys remember Coco's? It was a restaurant in California. Anyway, he was a manager of Coco's, and he was on the roof fixing something, and he cut his finger, and a little bit of blood came out, and he passed out.

4:22 That's how phobic he was of blood, of doctors, and everything else, so he avoided it like the plague. Well, because I was a little guy wanting to get into rapport with my father, I took on his phobia. So over the years, I've always avoided doctors, and I would avoid getting my blood taken. I would avoid getting checkups. I've recently had some moles removed because I grew up in Newport Beach, California, and I literally surfed every day for like 22 years, and I had some precancerous moles on me that I put off until only recently and had them removed.

4:55 So when I went to the doctor recently, and she told me, listen, you have degenerative spine disease. We need to do an MRI, and surgery is a possibility. When I first heard that, I was like, oh, fuck no, dude. I'm not going into surgery. I don't trust you people. In my opinion, up until recently, I used to believe that the second biggest cause of death was doctors. I read that somewhere like when I was in my 20s, and I was like, oh, yeah, that's true. Doctors are more dangerous than diseases themselves, and you hear many things in media where doctors don't know what the hell they're talking about.

5:29 They don't know anything about health. So I always thought I follow my own lead as an unapologetic alpha male, and I'm going to follow my own lead on my health too. I'm not going to trust these fuckers. If anything were to ever happen to me, I'll go into holistic modalities. I'm never going to the doctor. That was kind of my conclusion. But recently, I've realized, obviously, that doctors have merit. They have their worth, especially when it comes to structural things such as my spine issues. I recently watched a documentary, which I highly suggest.

6:00 I think it's on Netflix, about Joe Montana. Joe Montana, in my opinion, has one of the best mentalities you could ever emulate when you're trying to be successful in life. Well, what happened to him, which kind of motivated me to sack the fuck up and stop being a little pussy about my own back issues, is he had a similar issue. He had a bulging disc. He went in and got surgery, and within six weeks, the dude was playing again. So I started looking at myself, and I'm like, bro, you've been putting this off for literally a decade.

6:30 You've been walking around with sciatica in your hip. You do triathlons, but you're such a fucking pussy that you don't do the running part of them because of your excuse. Oh, I have a bad back. I have sciatica. I can't run. So I'm just going to do the swimming and the bike part. I'm not going to run. We make excuses to make up for our fears. And I want to put this to you, brother. What excuses are you making because of your fears? A lot of you guys listen to this podcast because you struggle with women, as I did too.

6:58 I have since faced my issues with women, faced the fact that I was fearful of rejection because I was extremely externally validated, caring so much about what she thought of me rather than only caring about what I think of myself. I got that fixed, but I'm not perfect, boys. I've bitched out in the way of medical stuff. So I want you to think about what you're bitching out about because of fear. And what is fear, as I always say? A lot of you guys should repeat after me, false evidence appearing real.

7:30 Fear, as I'm actually going to talk about in my next episode that's dropping on Thursday, which is called the purpose of life, in my opinion. Another thing I've been putting off because of fear, which I'll talk about later. Fear is the opposite of what you truly are, which is, and I really want you to listen. You are a powerful soul. You are a powerful creator, and you have within yourself, brother, the ability to get over everything that you fear if you would just face it. And this is called the I can principle.

8:03 I was thinking about going into surgery, getting my back opened up and my spine pulled apart, and then putting in some replacement into my back that's going to replace the marshmallow shit that's been disintegrating. And I was like, dude, that's scary. I don't want to do that. I don't trust these fuckers. These guys are probably going to kill me. I'm going to die. And I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Where are you getting this from? And I was like, well, my dad, right? My dad obviously had this.

8:27 And I just had a moment of awakening where I was like, why am I buying into this? I can do it. I can do this. And then I started thinking about my bigger phobias, which is open heart surgery, brain surgery. That is my number one fear. You have to be awake for that shit. While they crack open your head and like poke at your brain where you're like, yeah, I feel that in my hand. Oh, no, I feel that in my arm. I feel that in my penis.

8:52 Can you please keep doing that? Right? Brain surgery is literally my number one fear. But in this moment of awakening, which I want to share with you, and hopefully it will crack your own level of fears. In this moment of awakening, I was like, I can do that. I can do anything. And as I had this realization, which happened, of course, while I'm driving down the street, it always happens either in the shower or when you're driving, right? I just get real contemplative. I'm a philosophizer.

9:19 So I'm thinking about this stuff and I'm like, wait a minute. If I can get over any kind of medical thing and just man the fuck up and do it without being a little pussy like I've been in the past, I can do anything. What else do I fear? Hmm. I fear public ridicule. Well, I've overcome that because having a podcast like this one where you claim you're a dating coach for men, do you know how much hate that gets? Has the hate taken me down?

9:46 No, honestly, it's kind of built me up because I've reframed it in my mind that all the haters are nothing but peanut butter and jealous. They're trolls who don't have their lives together, so they need to make their own egos feel better by insulting guys like you and me. If a guy were ever to insult you because you're approaching a woman or you're trying to put yourself in a situation where you get better with women, or perhaps you're so fearful that you won't join a program like mine because you're afraid of what other people will think of you, you need to evaluate that.

10:17 What are you avoiding, brother? Because I'm telling you right now, and here's the point of this entire episode, you have the strength within you to overcome it if you just will let yourself believe, I can. I can get over my fear of rejection. I can get a hot girlfriend. I can start to believe that I'm worth it. I can overcome these stupid, baseless fears that were probably given to me before I could defend myself just by deciding I can do this, which is what I did with medical shit, and the freedom that overcame me when I made that simple decision of I can was overwhelming in the most positive way possible.

10:58 No longer does medical stuff have power over me. I can do it. It's going to suck. I may need to pop a Valium before I go in to get my back worked on. I can do it, and you could do it too, bro. What are you afraid of? You, brother, listening, you have fears. Your fears are all centered around belief systems, and I want you to listen closely. Belief systems that if I avoid this thing, I will be safe. If I do this thing, and the worst were to happen, I will be lessened somehow, and I may even lose my mind.

11:31 I may lose my reputation. You fear losing something. But here's the truth about how life works. When you face your fears, as that song went in the beginning, hey, brothers, my courageous fighting brothers, face your fears and follow me. When you face your fears, you realize that they are just phantoms. They are illusions. They are smoke and mirrors that have no power against the power of who you really are, which is a powerful creator. You have everything within you to overcome anything that you're scared of.

12:03 And if I may go so far as to say, you are a piece of God. God, what can God do? What is he able to overcome? You have that within you as well. And you need to say to yourself, I can do this. What is it that you're trying to get better at, brother? Hold your head up high. Hold your chin up. Put your back straight. Face it with the courage that you have inside you as an unapologetic alpha silverback because you can. And the second you start understanding that, you get freedom from everything that you've been fearing.

12:38 Fear is, again, false evidence appearing real. It's holding you down and you probably don't even know it. And brothers, this is the purpose of life. I'm going to give you a little hint as to what I'm going to talk about in my next episode. The purpose of life is to wake up to what you really are. And what you really are is love, courage, enthusiasm. You are a powerful piece of God incarnated in order to have the experience of the opposite of what you really are so that you can wake up to what you are, which is light, which is courage, which is the I can principle.

13:11 Because, brother, you can just like I can. Medical stuff ain't got shit on me now, bro. Bring that shit. I can do it. And that's why I constantly want you guys saying over and over again, I can do this. I am a girl magnet. I am attractive. I can achieve my goals. I have the power within me. And the only thing holding me back is fear, which, once again, is just false evidence appearing real. The fear is only there as an illusion. It's an illusion so you can wake up to your courage.

13:42 Just like somebody else stabbing you in the back, which really is just a play. We're just actors on the stage, stabbing each other in the back, fucking each other over. Why does that happen? So you can forgive that person. So you can actually have compassion for that person and demonstrate what you really are. Which, and I'm going to talk about it more on Thursday, is why we're here. So, brothers, you can do it. And I want you to think that. Your biggest fear, identify it right now.

14:09 Where did it come from, first of all? Why are you buying into that? Do you understand that there's some part of you that's trying to keep you safe by employing that fear? But, if I may guess, that fear is making you miserable, especially if it's fear of women. That fear, which is trying to keep you safe, is actually creating suffering because that's what fear does. Fear is part of the ego, the opposite of what you are. It's the darkness. And it's making you miserable, pretending to keep you safe.

14:39 What if you look that fear in the eye and say, no, man, I can do this. I can meet women, get a really high-quality woman. I can get over my fear of not being lovable. I can get over my fear of rejection, of a woman choosing another guy or cheating on me, leaving me, which has happened to a lot of you guys. You've had past experiences that are shaping your present reality, and you're letting fear hold you back, not saying to yourself, I can. And that's what I want you to take away from today's episode.

15:10 With everything you fear, just try it on, brother, like you're trying on a jacket. I can do it. I can overcome this. And when you say that to yourself enough times, you begin to believe it. A new belief system gets created, and you realize that the old phantom, such as me being afraid of needles and doctors and surgery, is just bullshit. And you start to reframe your belief systems. In my case, doctors are there to help me. Doctors are very talented. They're usually very compassionate people.

15:39 The medical system in America is by far the most advanced medical system in the world. And that's true in Germany. That's true in England. That's true in Canada. That's true in Australia. Why am I so afraid of it? Do I want my hip to feel better? Do I want my back to feel better? Of course I do. So man the fuck up and go get it taken care of, you fucking pussy. And that's the conversation that you need to have with yourself. And yeah, boys, sometimes you need to be a little bit brutal with yourself and be like, Man, I've really been a pussy in this situation.

16:06 Afraid of a girl? She's just a little girl. Who cares what she thinks? Why am I basing so much importance on what she thinks? Hmm, maybe it's because I place so much importance on what my mom thought. Maybe my dad told me I was unworthy and I bought into that in order to get rapport with him. But no, man, I can do it. I can walk it off. If she rejects me, I'm going to walk away congratulating myself and saying to myself, she's an idiot because she didn't see the championhood that was before her.

16:34 Her issue, not my issue. Then you have power over it and you realize that fear cannot prevent you from getting what you really want. What if in every situation of our lives, we were able to say, I can do that, right? Medical stuff, I got it, right? Finances, I can do it. My health, I got this shit, man. I can figure this out. Girls, I got this. It's easy. I mean, shit, just come join Mark in his three-month coaching program. I can do it. And when you have the I can principle, believing in yourself, which I want to remind you, you are a very powerful creator and you have way more potential than you're giving yourself credit for.

17:13 When you finally believe that by continuously questioning it and trying on like a jacket, the I can principle, you will accept the I can principle. And you, like me, will have an aha moment where medical stuff, in my case, and maybe girls in your case, no longer has power over you. You realize, shit, dude, I got power over this now. I'm not afraid of it. I can do it. I know I can. And when you have that freedom, that's where exaltation comes from. That's where enthusiasm comes from.

17:41 That's where you wake up to what you truly are, which is a powerful, courageous creator. And that seed is inside you, brother. Let it flourish. On that note, I am dropping a podcast on Thursday, which because of fear, I've been procrastinating on. I've been procrastinating because when I do spiritual type podcasts, I get a lot of hate. I get a lot of hate mail. I get a lot of threats. Boys, I've had death threats because of some of the stuff that I talk about. But fuck it.

18:08 I'm not afraid of it. I know that those people are just suffering, and I actually have compassion for them. So on Thursday, come back. I'm going to talk about my 25-plus years of studying spirituality, religion, the ascended masters, enlightened beings, and what I feel the purpose of life is, which I gave you a little bit of a taste today. I think this is going to be a great episode. I want you guys to come check it out. And if you don't like it, I'm afraid I can't help you with that because it's important to me.

18:36 And I know that if it helps at least one of you out there, then it's worth it, as I hope that this episode helped at least one of you guys. Wake up to what you really are, brother, because you're powerful. Stop succumbing to fear. It ain't shit compared to you. You can. Hold your head up high. Keep your spine straight. Have that smirk on your face because you are a champion and you are a powerful, powerful creator. Believe it, and you will see the results it will produce in your life.

19:06 Gentlemen, I do appreciate you listening. I drop podcasts on Mondays and Thursdays, so definitely stay tuned for the next one, and I will see you in the next episode. I'll see you in the next episode.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.