Why Women Really Want Jerks and Not Nice Guys

0:00 You guys have seen it. You get these complete assholes who look like absolute scum living in their mom's basement. They completely use her. They even cheat on her. And for some reason, these chicks stick around because essentially you want to be a good dude. But every time you are a good dude and you treat a woman well, she blows you out. Everybody wants a challenge that when you have a guy that comes along who truly doesn't give a fuck, she chases that dude. So the real question is, can you be a good person and still attract and keep a high-quality girl?

0:32 So the way to make a high-quality girl fall in love with you and stay with you? The Unapologetic Man Podcast. What is up, gentlemen? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP, the Uniform Mike Papa. I got a great one for you today, boys. This one's going to go in a lot of different directions, but I hope to give you some good information as to why you should be an asshole to women. You need to treat them like crap. You need to be completely selfish.

0:54 Be narcissistic. Do not chase them in any way whatsoever. Be a complete dick and you'll get the girl. I mean, it works, right? You guys have seen it. You get these complete assholes who look like absolute scum living in their mom's basement pulling these absolute baddies. And these guys are just jackasses, man. They look like they should be at the wrong end of a freak show experience. They look like they don't have their lives together in any way whatsoever. They don't treat the woman well. They completely use her.

1:26 They even cheat on her. And for some reason, these chicks stick around. Have you guys ever had it where you kind of didn't like a girl? Maybe she was a seven. She was kind of like a moped, fun to ride, but you didn't want to be seen with her. So you kept her at arm's length and then she fell in love with you. Have you noticed that the worse you treat these chicks, the more they seem to get into you? And a lot of you guys have moral conundrums about this because you're like, well, I want to be a good dude.

1:51 I don't want to be an asshole because assholes just ruin this world. Nobody likes a dick. Nobody likes a hater. Nobody likes a guy who treats women like shit. Yet, why do those guys get success? Does this ever piss you off? Does it piss in your river, launch a 50-foot rope of diarrhea into your morning coffee? Because essentially you want to be a good dude, but every time you are a good dude and you treat a woman well, she blows you out. Why the fuck is this the case?

2:18 Well, I'm going to explain that to you guys. And obviously, you know, I'm just kidding. We don't want to be assholes to women. We are good dudes. And what I like a lot about guys who listen to my podcast, the most of them, is that you are good guys. You do have good intentions. So the real question is, can you be a good person and still attract and keep a high-quality girl? You guys know what I'm going to say. The answer to that is unequivocally yes.

2:42 So what we're going to do is we're going to learn why jerks get girls in the first place. And we're going to steal their secrets yet still be a good dude in the first place. That was such a hard sentence to say. I actually recorded that three different times, but my editing team is so gangster. They made it seem seamless for you, but I'm not always perfect in this podcast. I make a lot of mistakes. And what's funny to me is I've been reviewing my Spotify, iTunes, and Instagram comments lately.

3:09 I've actually been replying to Spotify comments. So if you leave a comment on there, that is me replying back to you, usually thanking the cool people. But inevitably, boys, you get a lot of haters. And as we're talking about jerks, I want to talk about the jerks on the internet forums, the jerks who are hiding behind their keyboards, the people whose lives basically suck, and they attack people like me and you because we're winners. Here's the way to tell the leader. It's the guy with the most arrows in his back.

3:38 So if you get haters, it's because you're succeeding. And as I always say, if they're trying to bring you down, it's probably because you're doing something right. So I get all these haters who comment negatively on my podcast or on my Instagram forum. Usually, it's about 90% good stuff and then about 10% bad stuff. Well, here's the truth about haters. Nobody would ever hate on you or on me unless their life truly sucked. Nobody would ever attack somebody who's below them. So what we know immediately about haters is that they're failing in life, they're extremely upset, and nothing feels better than to correct the coach or to insult a guy like you because it makes their ego feel better.

4:19 I had a guy leave a comment the other day, which honestly I thought was really funny. He said, if you stop saying bro so many times in your podcast, I'll apply to your program. And I have to say that was really fucking funny. But ultimately, this guy is just a hater, right? Just like a lot of the other haters. Life fucking sucks, doesn't get success, dick is so dry every time he masturbates, it catches on fire. And that got me thinking the difference between a winner and a loser.

4:44 A winner, when things go wrong, and this is what I want you to do, brother, you listening. A winner, when things go wrong, he always looks at how he can improve them, and he takes the failures as lessons as to how he can improve them. And he takes the failures to teach him how he can improve his life. The loser, on the other hand, laments in his failures, complains to others about it, constantly thinks about it, and then starts attacking other people. Don't get it twisted, boys.

5:12 The winner has a life that is just as hard as the loser does. Things go wrong for him. He gets rejected. I get rejected all the time, man. I get tons of hatred, as I'm just talking about, but I don't always win. Things don't always go well for me. Just because I have a successful podcast in business, it doesn't mean I'm winning all the time. That's an illusion. I fail a lot too, but the difference is when I fail, as well as you listening, I take that failure as constructive criticism and use the lessons I learned to make myself better.

5:42 And I'm always trying to focus on the positive of it. What positive thing can I learn from this failure? A jerk, who we're going to talk about today and why he gets women, or a hater, takes the failures in life and laments about it, constantly thinks about it, constantly has that victim mentality, and then he'll reach out and attack other people. Honestly, think about these people, these keyboard jockeys, who not only are hating on me, but hundreds of different influencers throughout the internet. What is your life like where you're actually going to take the time to send somebody hatred?

6:14 Think about that, and the next time somebody hates on you, understand that they're just a loser, and honestly, they're suffering a lot in life. So to the guy who told me to stop saying, bro, and he will apply to my program, that sounds like a deal, bro. I really think you should come apply to my program, Broseph Stalin. If you don't apply to my program, Brotein Shake, I'm going to get really pissed off, Theodore Brosevelt. So be a fucking brosiden, be a brodo Baggins, flex your bro-tator cuff, and come join us in the program, bro-tator supreme.

6:42 I'd super appreciate it. So I had this guy try to barter with me the other day to give me something in exchange for coming into my program, and he's like, bro, my cousin is an electrician. He'll rewire your whole house if you just let me into the program, bro, and I was like, Brotein Shake, we can't do that for you, bro-bo cop. I apologize, Broby One Kenobi, but it just can't happen. So if you want to barter with me, probably not going to happen, but I couldn't hate on the guy for trying.

7:07 So we're going to talk about jerks, right? Why do these guys get girls? Ultimately, the reason they get girls is because they don't give a fuck. They show her that they are completely outcome dependent. They don't care what happens. She doesn't really matter that much to them. And through their own narcissism, through their own selfishness, they inadvertently communicate that they will drop her at a moment's hesitation. They have other options because a guy who is willing to drop a girl and willing to be selfish, willing to be an asshole, obviously has other options because most guys are thirsty as fuck, and they don't chase the girl.

7:41 They are a challenge, which make up the fundamental backbone of how to attract women. You want to be a challenge. You don't want to be easy. You want to always behave as if you're dating four other girls. And ultimately, she can't get enough of you. This is what the jerk displays quintessentially in his actions. Now, the real question is, are all girls attracted to guys who demonstrate jerky behavior? No, obviously not. A girl who's emotionally healthy, a girl who would be a good partner for you and even a good wife for you, possibly the mother of your children, she wouldn't fall for the jerk's games.

8:16 But she will fall, quote unquote, for what I call the 8100 rule, always giving her less than what she wants from you. Now, the reason, again, is everybody wants a challenge. Once and last time you had a girl who threw herself at you, worshipped you, and you completely fell for her. It usually doesn't happen that way. Usually, the way it happens is you meet a really hot girl who you're super attracted to. The sex is amazing, but you just can't quite have her, can you? She's a little bit out of your grasp.

8:48 She kind of pushes you away a little bit, and you fantasize about her. You think about her. You find yourself wanting to hang out with her more and more. That's because it's human nature to want what we can't have, to chase what is essentially unattainable. Well, women, especially attractive ones, experience this so rarely that when you have a guy that comes along who truly doesn't give a fuck, is willing to drop her, she chases that dude. Here's a tip, boys, and I don't necessarily recommend this.

9:16 I'm going to tell you what I do recommend, but this will work for you, and I'm sure it's worked for many of you. If you have sex with a girl, and from that point forward, you're never the one to initiate the first text. You're never the one to initiate hanging out. You're never the one chasing her in any way whatsoever. You don't text her. You don't ask her to hang out. You wait for her to do all the texting to you first. You wait for her to suggest hanging out, and you basically keep her at arm's length.

9:43 She'll probably fall in love with you. And this is a reality that perhaps we can admit isn't the most ideal, right? It's kind of fucked up. But don't hate the messenger. Hate the game. It's not my fault this shit works, and you guys have seen it work many times. Where you're kind of dating a chick who's a moped, fun to ride, but you don't want to be seen with her. She gets super sprung on you, and you're kind of like, yeah, I don't know. I don't really want to hang out with that girl, and then she falls in love with you.

10:07 You, as well as me, have literally had girls fall in love with you who, and in my case, I broke up with them. And this girl shows up at my door or calls me and says, hey, I'm in love with you. And I'm like, didn't we break up last week? And I said I didn't want to hang out with you anymore. Are you delusional? Are you crazy? Or you're kind of seeing a girl. You let her know, hey, I'm not really looking for a relationship. And you say what I always teach you boys to say, relationships that start fast, end fast.

10:35 So I want to take it slow. If that's a deal breaker for you, cool, we can part ways. When you have that mentality, the mentality of a quote-unquote jerk, girls get super fucking attracted to that. You're a challenge. You have options. You're not needy. I gave some names to my haters on Instagram as well as Spotify. We got the hater Palm Pilot Pete who masturbates so much he's about to go for a world record. We got Wank Master Wayne, the same dude who said, if you stop saying, bro, I will apply to your program.

11:05 What's up, Wank Master Wayne? We got Lubin Larry and we got Low Value Lloyd. What does Low Value Lloyd do? He chases girls. He tries to prove to them that he's good enough. He's fucking needy. Why is he needy? Probably because he was deprived of love when he was a kid. His mom or his dad didn't give him enough love or at some point in his life, he felt unworthy. Therefore, he's chasing a girl to try to validate him, showing her that he's not internally motivated.

11:33 He's externally motivated and validated, needing her validation to say that he's enough. Who's the scum-ridden motherfucker at the bar who looks like he just stepped out of a gangster rap magazine and he's with the Smokeshow 10, kind of ignoring her, making her pay for the drinks. I've literally seen this. Who's that guy? He doesn't give a shit what happens because he has options. Even if he's completely delusional, well, at least he's telegraphing options. This is why I teach you guys the golden rule. What's the golden rule?

12:04 For those of you who have been listening for a long time, you literally pretend you have a bracelet on your wrist that says, what would I do if I were dating four girls? If I were dating four girls, would I give a shit if this girl didn't show up with me to the nightclub? No, I'd get my scummy ass pants on with my scummy ass ball cap on and some shirt written with BO and go to the nightclub and talk to girls like I don't give a fuck what happens and they would get attracted to me.

12:30 Then through my selfishness, my narcissism, my complete and utter disregard for anybody else's feelings, they'd get attracted to me and possibly fall in love with me. On the other hand, you get these haters on Spotify and Instagram who have had so little success, they have to spew hatred at influencers like myself. You got Palm Pilot Pete, whose dick is so dry when he jerks off, it's like he's trying to start a campfire. His dick is so dry when he pees, the only thing that comes out is sand.

12:59 And his dick is so dry, even his hand friendzoned it. Or you got Wank Master Wayne, our hero from the beginning of the podcast who looks like a melted candle wearing gym shorts, looks like a thumb with eyebrows drawn on it, or looks like a soggy pillow and a fucking hoodie who isn't getting any success and therefore he's going to hate on guys like you and me. Remember, boys, the tallest poppy always gets cut. If they're trying to hate on you, it's probably because you're doing something right.

13:26 And a jerk is only a guy who is deeply dysfunctional, and unfortunately, a lot of women resonate with that dysfunction. Now, that begs the question, well, what about a healthy girl? Does she ever fall into the trap of a jerk, a guy who doesn't give a shit? You guys know the answer to that. Of course they do. And you've seen it so many times. You get this beautiful homecoming queen in high school who's dating the most scum-ridden, asshole, selfish, narcissistic motherfucker you've ever seen. And you're like, why, dude?

13:56 I would treat her so much better. And then you write a poem and leave a fucking flower on her car, and she looks at you like you just sprayed her face with shit mist. And you're like, why do nice guys always finish last? Because women are attracted to dudes who don't need them. And that's the point. If you have sex with a girl and you never text her again, she's probably going to chase you. She's probably going to fall in love. How can we use what assholes do to our unfair advantage?

14:22 Well, there comes my 80-100 rule. If you always give the girl less than what she wants from you, you will always be in the power position, and she will always be chasing you. So what's the 80-100 rule? Which really should be called the 8-10 rule. You give her 80% of what she wants from you. She wants to hang out five times a week. You hang out four. She gives you 10 compliments. For example, you give her eight. She wants to talk this much of her texting. You only give her 80%.

14:48 What I tell my clients all the time is you have to give women an experience like they are in a fairy tale, but always, always leave them wanting more. So for an example, you have a date, and you spit epic game like I talk about all the time in this podcast. You use all my gambits, all my tricks. You use all the philosophies, the four pillars of attraction. You get her really attracted. You need to make her feel like she did when she was a little girl living in fairy tale land.

15:18 When she's playing in her Barbie dollhouse and feeling so good with her friends as they pretend, you need to give them that same feeling. I'm sure all of you, and this includes me, have had a feeling generated that reminds you of your childhood. Maybe it's something you smell or a song that you hear or a taste that you taste, and it brings you immediately back to those magical times of childhood. You need to bring her back to that magical feeling of childhood when you're hanging out with her, but at the same time, not let her completely have you.

15:50 So you tell her to go before she's ready to go. You don't let her hang out with you as much as she wants to, but at the same time, you could treat her well. So the way to make a high-quality girl fall in love with you and stay with you is to treat her like gold, but at the same time, let her know that you will drop her at the flip of a switch. You want her, but you don't need her. You are, for all intents and purposes, happy within yourself, unlike the haters who are spewing hate both at you and at me on Instagram and Spotify because their life fucking sucks.

16:22 Are these guys going to be able to attract a high-quality woman? Well, perhaps in the beginning, but eventually, once a high-quality woman is with the jerk, she may initially get attracted. She may even fall in love, but eventually, she's going to realize what his game is, what his insecurities are. The fact that he's a jerk, he's selfish, he's narcissistic, he doesn't treat her the way she deserves, and she'll leave him. So we can leverage the techniques of the jerk, being slightly out of her grasp, being a challenge, not being needy, loving our own life and putting it as a priority, chasing our dreams as she chases us.

17:00 She'll fall in love, but at the same time, you can still treat her well. Listen to any and all my podcasts about trust and connection, how to make a woman feel heard. We're going to do all that stuff. We're going to be good fucking dudes, but we're not going to blow smoke up her ass, put her on a pedestal, and do what essentially chases women away. So do jerks get girls? Hell yeah, they do. And you guys have all seen it. But why do they get girls?

17:23 Because what I just told you, they have the vibe of, I want you, but I don't need you. Kick rocks with your head down if you don't like it. My life is number one. You can come be my sidekick. And girls get addicted to that. Throw onto that the magical experience that reminds her of how she felt, and listen to those words, how she felt when she was a child. Taking her under your wing like she's your little sidekick and showing her an amazing time, giving her those high emotional peaks, and then at the same time kind of pushing her away before she's had enough of you.

17:54 That's the magic formula, boys. So instead of turning into a bitter hater who's going to go leave hate comments on some dude's YouTube channel or Instagram channel, fix yourself, admit that you have work to do, and steal the secrets of jerks. Never fucking be needy. Don't need a woman's validation. Don't ever, under any circumstance, chase a woman. Screen for high interest. Only women who are highly interested in you get your time, but they only get 80% of your time that they want from you. And for God's sakes, boys, don't turn into a hater.

18:27 Life is hard. I understand. But the second you start lashing out at other people, it just shows how much of a failure you really are. Let's not be like Wank Master Wayne, Lubin Larry, and low-value Ned, because those guys are basically failing and just have given up. A couple other funny things I thought to say to these guys is you look like the final boss in a video game called Incel Chronicles, Basement of Doom, as he sits there at his masturbation station going for the world record.

18:54 Your girlfriend is so fat, when she wears a Malcolm X t-shirt, helicopters land on her back. And then finally, your girlfriend is so ugly, she went into a haunted house and came out with a job offer. Obviously, I'm joking, boys. Just wanted to fuck with them a little bit because they're constantly like little piranhas nipping at your ankles as you're walking up the river to get to the top of the mountain. Wherever you go, guys, if you get success, you're going to get haters. So do what I did to that dude who said, if you say, bro, Les, I'll go ahead and apply it to your program.

19:25 I was like, bro, that was really funny. And I put a fucking like on what he said because the only thing you can do with haters is have them make you laugh. That's the way to succeed with them. So, boys, steal the secrets of the jerk. Don't give a shit. Have options. Be essentially selfish in going after your purpose. You chase your purpose. She chases you. And finally, guys, remember what I said. The winner takes failures as constructive criticism, uses them to ameliorate himself, better himself, does not lament on them as the loser does.

19:59 Here's the mentality of a loser. He gets failures as we all do. He dwells on them. He gets bitter. And then what does he do? He blames and lashes out at other people. Once you become the victim and you start attacking other people, any energy you put out there comes back to you. So, no matter how bad it gets, laugh, smile. That's the essence of frame control. Put a like on that hate comment because that shows that you are essentially above it. So, Wank Master Wayne, I wish you nothing but the best, bros of Stalin.

20:29 And if you ever want to come into my program, you got to spot Brotado Supreme. I got you, brofessor. Don't even worry about it, Brotendo, Bromigo, Brodo Baggins. I got your back. So, guys, I super appreciate you listening. As a reminder, I drop podcasts on Mondays and Thursdays. So, please stay tuned for the next one. And I will see you in the next episode. What is up, brother? Just wanted to thank you sincerely for watching this episode. If you've gotten any value whatsoever out of my content, the single best way to help me is to like, comment, subscribe, leave me a review.

21:03 You have no idea how much that helps me. Also, if you're struggling with women and you want to talk to me personally about how I can help you achieve your goals with women, sign up for my three-month coaching program below and you and I will talk. Join us in the unapologetic army.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.