How to Have a FaceTime Call or Bumble Video Call With a Woman

0:00 Getting her over to texting and then doing FaceTime feels a little bit more intimate as the Bumble feature is for her security, right? It's so she doesn't have to give you her number. But as I discussed in a recent episode, we want her in a series of micro yeses, saying yes to different things, complying with our requests, one of which is getting her phone number. Once you get a girl's phone number, she's kind of given up something a little bit more personal. Therefore, she feels closer to you than she would some other Canyon mule who she's talking to on the dating apps.

0:33 Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast. The only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, you legends? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP. And today, boys, I am going to teach you how to have a FaceTime call or a Bumble video call with a girl before you actually go on a date with her. How many times have you guys gone on a date with a chick, especially from online dating, and she shows up and she looks like a Canyon mule when in her picture she looks like Princess Orgasm and you're like, what the fuck happened, man?

1:14 What the fuck happened with filters, you fucking idiot? So you need to vet these chicks before you actually go on a date with them. I'm going to tell you what to do, how to get her attracted to you, how to line it up, how long you should do it, what you should look like, the kind of questions you should ask, what you should talk about, and what you should vet to make sure that she's up to snuff, and how to get her on a date with you after you do said call.

1:35 This is a really good one, boys, so stay tuned until the end, because once again, I am going to deliver the content. As a lot of you guys know, I am having an online dating masterclass taking place this Saturday, June 28th at 2.30 p.m. Mountain Time. It's going to be a two-hour event, and if you can't make it, you can still get a recording of it. A lot of you guys have heard about this already, so I'm going to blow through this really quickly, but if you haven't heard about it, you can still get your tickets.

2:03 Here's what we did. It was basically a big experiment, experiment, and what we did is we took 11 guys over four months. We got on 20-plus dating apps, and we sent over 13,267 messages to test what works, what doesn't. We tested bios, prompts, pictures, openers, closing lines, premium features, and psychological triggers, and boys, the results we got were unbelievable. In fact, kind of a funny story, one guy in our group, and he's cool with me talking about this. I just texted him and asked him. I was like, yo, Steve.

2:39 His name was Steve. We actually called him Ice Age Steve because he looked like he just thawed out from the Ice Age, and he laughs about it. He doesn't have any ego issues about that, but he's not really a good-looking dude, and this is specifically why I chose him because I wanted to see him getting absolutely zero results, and he hadn't gone through my program yet, so he knew nothing about this stuff. Him getting zero results. Could we get him results on the dating apps? Because I know a lot of you guys have had zero results or at least abysmal results getting matched with canyon mules and mountain trolls, and even if you do look like an unfrozen caveman the way Ice Age Steve does, you can still get results because of optimization, which is what we uncovered over the last four months.

3:18 The best prompts to use, how to get girls to message you first, the best pictures to use, very important, as well as the best messages to use, and we got him laid three times in four months. I think that's pretty damn good for a guy who had absolutely zero results, like literally, boys. He got zero fucking matches, but once we optimized his profile and applied all the secrets that we uncovered in this four months of research, we got him lots of matches, we got him lots of dates, and he got laid three different times.

3:47 I think he had 16 or 17 dates. I'll have to confirm that with him, but dude, that's a lot over four months, especially for a guy who had zero results. Now, some of our other dudes, including a dude who's five foot six, got similar results. Guys, it's not about what you look like. It's not about your height. It's about optimization, and that's what we're going to teach you on this masterclass. One last thing I want to say about this. A lot of you guys will never get to the point where you're going to be comfortable, cold approaching, doing top of funnel ideas, in-person kind of shit, and you hide behind the dating apps because that's the only thing you're truly comfortable doing.

4:25 Why then would you skip a masterclass like this when I'm going to teach you all the secrets that iMark Singh know about how to optimize the dating apps if, for some of you guys, that's your only option? So listen, I have a money back guarantee. If it doesn't absolutely blow your mind, which I know it will, you could get your money back. I am going to give you 60 plus openers, and not just openers, but you say this, she says this, you say this, she says this, you say this, bam, she says this, you go for the close.

4:53 I'm going to give you 60 fucking templates to test on the dating apps, as well as a myriad of answers to prompts, how to ask girls interesting questions, and of course, how to get her on a date and even on a FaceTime call before the date, which we're going to talk about today. Boys, don't let this opportunity slip you by. This is a one-time event. Click the link in the description below. Get your ticket right now. The small money you're going to invest in this masterclass is going to be saved by you skipping on all the BS premium features and upgrades that these damn dating apps try to get you to make when, in fact, you don't need to make them.

5:32 I'm going to tell you which ones you need, which ones you don't. You're going to save the amount of money that this masterclass costs. So click the link right now, get your ticket before it's too late, and I will see you this coming Saturday. All right, boys, let's get into the content. So many times we want to have a FaceTime call with the chick or a Bumble video call with a girl before we meet up with her. This is one thing I really like about Bumble, and this is something we too experimented with, the video call feature to vet the girl and make sure that she's up to snuff.

6:05 And look at the way I'm framing that. I'm not saying a video call to try to prove to her that we're good enough. I'm saying a video call to vet her and make sure she's good enough. Because if you think she looks like Princess G-Spot and she shows up looking like a mountain troll, you're going to be fucking pissed. And this has happened to many of you guys because girls lie out of their teeth on the dating apps. They put up fake pictures that are highly Photoshopped.

6:31 They at the very minimum run some filters on them. And while that's okay, sometimes it gets out of line and you want to actually meet the girl. If she shows up to the FaceTime call looking like your grandfather's couch, then you could know better not to ask her on a date. So what we do first, obviously, is message with her on the dating apps. Then what I suggest you do is you yank her off the dating apps and get her onto a text message conversation. But in the case of Bumble, what I suggest you do is you go for the call.

6:57 So the way to do this is very simple. You simply say something like this. Hey, listen, I'm sure like me, you've probably had some bad experiences on these apps. Maybe a guy showed up and he wasn't exactly what you expected. So how would you feel about doing a very quick call to see if we jive, to see if we have chemistry before we take this to the next step? That will usually convince them to do so. Then you guys organize it, either doing it on Bumble.

7:26 I personally like FaceTime a little bit better. We've noticed through our research that women prefer that as well. The Bumble thing, it's okay. We had a couple dozen of them that went well, but really getting her over to texting and then doing FaceTime feels a little bit more intimate as the Bumble feature is for her security, right? It's so she doesn't have to give you her number. But as I discussed in a recent episode, we want her in a series of micro yeses, saying yes to different things, complying with our requests, one of which is getting her phone number.

7:54 Once you get a girl's phone number, she's kind of given up something a little bit more personal. Therefore, she feels closer to you than she would some other Canyon mule who she's talking to on the dating apps. So you get her phone number and then you're texting with her and you say what I said. Hey, listen, I'm sure you've had some bad experiences with online dating as have I. A guy shows up and he looks like an unfrozen caveman when you thought he was going to look like Brad Pitt.

8:19 How would you feel about jumping on a quick FaceTime call? They're usually going to say yes. Now, obviously, boys, you want to get yourself all done up. Put your makeup on, bro. Put on your lipstick. Take down the poster about the murder orgy that you participated in last month and hide that shit. Make sure you look good. Make sure your place doesn't look like a fucking hovel. Many times I've talked to girls on FaceTime and their fucking room looks like a goddamn hovel. I talked to this girl once where she was in her car and the freaking backseat looked like a trash can.

8:52 There was probably cheese stuck on the ceiling. She's like eating a cheeseburger. She's like, I don't want this cheese. And then she just hucks it and it sticks on the ceiling of her car. There was probably French fries between the seats. Literally, there was like bras and panties and like fucking dead cats and dogs in her backseat. And I was like, yo, if this chick lives like this, what does that say about her? So guys, obviously clean up your place, run a tight battleship. I want your place so clean.

9:16 You could bounce quarters off the bed. Furthermore, pluck your unibrow, pluck your nose hairs, shave for God's sakes, brush your teeth. If you show up to this call and there's a big ass bean on your lateral incisor and you're like, hey, nice to meet you. And it's like this big old Del Taco bean. She's going to be like, ew, this guy's gross. Run a tight battleship. Make sure you look good. Next thing, boys, what do I always tell you are the two most important things about approaching a woman?

9:42 The most important thing, as I say time and time again, is your energy, feeling good inside your body, not being a spaz, but just simply feeling good, hopefully feeling better than she feels. The second most important thing is your tonality. Having a tonality that goes from up to down, as I talked about in my Why You Should Talk to Girls Like a Peasant podcast, which was really hilarious, how your voice needs to be authoritative, up to down, male to female. You're the leader. Do you think getting on a call cold with a girl is a good idea?

10:15 Obviously not. So what should we do? We should warm up our voice. You could do that in several ways. The first thing I love to do is call a girl who already has a crush on me or call somebody who's socially lower value than I am, such as perhaps for you guys, like a little sister or like a little cousin or somebody who works for you. You want to get your voice in that right calibration and you want to get warmed up before you actually get on a FaceTime call with this girl.

10:43 So you can either call somebody or you can just stand in the mirror and pretend to be talking to get your voice dialed in. Here's a quick little down and dirty trick that you can do to lower your voice a couple octaves. What you do is you yawn with your mouth closed and you're actually stretching out the part that's right by your Adam's apple deep in your throat, which is your vocal cords. So you're yawning, therefore opening up the vocal cords in your throat, stretching them, which is actually going to drop your voice a couple of octaves.

11:19 I myself was not born with a really good voice. It's funny to me that God gave me this gift that I'm able to podcast really well, but he's like, yeah, I'm not going to give you a good voice. Thanks a lot, God. You really screwed me over on that one. But I feel like he gave me good information, good charisma, made me pretty funny. And that's why I'm a good podcaster, but I don't have a good voice. So oftentimes before I go in to meet a girl or have a FaceTime call, I will stretch my vocal cords, which once again, has you yawning with your mouth closed, stretching out the area above your Adam's apple, which is your voice box, thus dropping your voice a couple of octaves and thus making your voice more attractive.

11:59 So do that before you get on the call with her. All right. So you guys have the time for your call. Let's say you set it up for like three o'clock. So call her pretty much on the dot. I like to start my coaching calls right on the dot. And I always brag to my boys. I'm like, dude, I've never once been late of all the years that I've been doing coaching calls. I start on the fucking minute. So do I suggest you call her late, call her early, maybe a couple minutes late, but even then I kind of like it.

12:27 I just like to call her on the dot. Maybe some of you guys will think it's try hard. I think it's respectful. You agreed at three o'clock. You're going to call her right at three o'clock. All right. So while it's ringing, obviously you're having good body language because when you put your shoulders back and you kind of bring your chest up and you bring your chin up and you have a smile, you will actually physically feel better. You will engage confidence in your nervous system so that you behave better.

12:51 So none of this crouching over with your arms crossed, feeling really insecure. Even before the call takes place, you can walk around your room with your arms up and just be like, yeah, bro, I'm a champion. I'm a legend. Let's do this. Wait until this girl meets me. I want you pumping yourself up because again, your tonality is going to telegraph how confident you are. And a woman's attraction for you is based on your confidence, as we all know. So it's ringing. You're confident. She picks up the phone and you're like, hey, Sarah, nice to meet you.

13:22 You're very genuine. You're very nice. And then you begin the conversation. First thing I like to say is, so how's it been going for you on the dating apps? A little weird, isn't it? I want you guys to have a commonality that you can immediately relate to that involves what? The one thing you have in common, the dating apps. So what I like to point out is how it's crazy how the dating apps are, how there's a lot of like psycho people on there. And even this call, right?

13:46 It's crazy that we can actually have a video call on Bumble. Like how crazy is this? What's your experience been like? Now you guys are relating on some commonality, which is the dating apps suck. And yes, even girls think the dating apps suck. A lot of women who are on the dating apps feel like, I can't believe I had to resort to this. This is kind of embarrassing. This kind of sucks. So you guys relate to that. So you're like, so is this the first Bumble call you've ever had?

14:11 And she'll be like, no, I've had a couple. You'd be like, it's a little weird, right? This dating online dating thing. It's a little weird, right? Too bad. We can't meet people organically. You're relating. You're showing her that you're real. You're showing her that you have a good personality. You can be related to. And once again, you guys kind of have a common enemy, which builds what I call an alliance. You and her kind of talking shit about the dating apps. Although if you look at it, it's the dating app that introduced you to.

14:39 So it's kind of a fucked up thing to talk shit about it, but this makes you guys relate. You have something in common. You have a common enemy, thus creating that alliance. So what you want to do then is you want to ask her some of the basic questions that we all ask each other to get to know each other. Now, for those of you who have been listening to my podcast for a long time, you should know that we have very standardized ways to answer the boring questions that girls are going to ask you.

15:08 Those questions are, what do you do for a living? What do you do for fun? Where are you from? Do you have any brothers or sisters? Now, this call should last about 10 minutes. And I want you guys to end the call before she's ready to end it. So sometimes what I like to do is put a hard stop in place. Be like, hey, I have about 10 minutes and then I have a meeting. So I have a hard stop at 310, but let's get into it. I like to put that precedence in place to know that, listen, girl, you're only going to get like 10, maybe 20 minutes with me.

15:37 And then I'm dipping out because we want to leave her on a high note and we never, ever under any circumstance want to overstay our welcome. So you begin the conversation. Hey, this is weird, right? Like online dating. It's crazy. How's it been going for you? Yeah, I had this weird situation. This girl like stalked me. It was crazy. So you're not a stalker, Texas Ranger, are you? No, no, I'm not that way. Cool. So, hey, out of curiosity, what do you do for a living?

16:00 Okay. That's typically what people are going to ask each other when you first meet. What do you do? Where are you from? Like, what do you do for hobbies? I like to ask, what do you do for a living? Because it offers a ton of opportunity for me to run my charisma, run my gambits, run my value, as a lot of you guys have heard. If a girl asks you what you do for a living, a lot of you guys should know you answer it in a three-part way.

16:24 The first part is something funny and completely ridiculous. She believes you for a second and you say, no, I'm just fucking with you. Second thing is the truth. What do you really do? And then the third thing is a story about how you became that thing and overcame adversity in order to do so. So the way I'll usually do it is I'll kick it off. I'll be like, so, hey, I'm curious about you. What do you do for a living? Let me guess, let me guess.

16:47 Ice cream man or machine gun saleswoman? Which one? And she's like, no, that's not true. I'm actually, I don't know, an accountant. Okay. Now, when it comes to her telling you what job she has, you either have to say, oh, that's cool. What inspired you to want to do that? Or if the job sucks and you want to read her to see whether or not she likes the job, if she feels the job sucks, you can ask her if she ever takes revenge on her clients.

17:14 So for example, you're like, so what do you do for a living? Let me guess, let me guess. You're an ice cream man, aren't you? No, I'm not. Really? I thought I saw you driving the truck down Denver. I love ice cream, so don't be ashamed. No, no, I'm not. I'm actually an accountant. And when she says that, she's kind of like, no, I'm actually an accountant. And she's not really pumped on being an accountant. I would say then, oh, really? It seems like you kind of like, don't love it.

17:35 Is it, is it a pretty tough job? And she's like, yeah, it's okay. It's just a lot of numbers and a lot of hours. And then I'd be like, well, do you ever take revenge on your clients? Like a client's a big asshole to you. And you're like, hmm, here's 20,000 extra in taxes from the IRS. And she's like, no, I would never do that. And I'd be like, well, what would you do if you had no chance of failure? Which is an awesome question. I love to ask women, what would you do if you had no chance of failure?

18:02 What would you do if you had a week's pay and you could just travel anywhere? So if she's kind of negative about it, I'll make a joke about how she takes revenge on people. And then what I'll do is I'll ask her to kind of fantasize with me. Where would you go right now? If you could travel anywhere, what would you do with no chance of failure? What was your dream as a little girl to become? Okay. If she likes her job, then what I'll say is, oh, that's cool.

18:23 What inspired you to want to become, let's say a doctor or something. What inspired you to become an oncology doctor? That's a real respectable job. Why'd you become that? Something happened in your childhood. Let her talk a little bit. Okay. People love to talk about themselves. And then hopefully if she's socially intelligent, she's going to ask you the same thing back. So what do you do for a living? And this goes into the three-part answer. First, something silly, ridiculous, then the truth, then a story. So the funny, ridiculous thing that I like to say lately is that I'm a penguin valet.

18:56 Did you know that penguins, when they fall over, they can't pick up themselves? So I work at the Denver Zoo and I pick up all the penguins that fall over because they'll die. If they fall over and can't get up, they'll die. So I run around picking up penguins. And this one guy, man, penguin 316, his name is Robert, that little fucker always falls over. Now they don't trust me unless I'm wearing a tuxedo. So every day I have to get dressed up in a tuxedo and it actually says penguin valet on the back.

19:20 And I'm running around picking up these penguins. It's a really, really hard job, but I love my little guys, especially little Robert. He's a good little fella. Sometimes he jumps up and comes into my arms and I rock them around a little bit. We have a really good relationship. She's like, are you serious? He'd be like, no, I'm fucking with you. You really think when penguins fall over, they can't get up? Of course they can. No, I'm actually an NLP coach. Do you know what NLP is?

19:45 And she'll say no. And then I'll explain it's neuro-linguistic programming. I work with men to remap their belief systems, to take away traumas, to build confidence so they can believe in themselves again and become the man that they've always wanted to become. In fact, I got into this because when I lived in Japan, I used to have panic attacks and agoraphobia. Nothing worked. So I actually found a NLP coach. He was in the United States. We did it on the phone and literally he removed my anxiety within days of meeting him, just a few NLP processes.

20:18 Once that happened, I was sold. Now I'm an NLP coach and that's how I became what I am. Look how much value is punched into that little bit that I just did. The penguin thing was funny. I also say I'm an ass model. I'm a funeral hunger. I'm a sex doll tester. I'm a backflip expert. I'm an almond milker. I milk almonds at the almond farm to get almond milk. Just something ridiculous. Then I say what I really am. Then I say something that I overcame to become what I am today.

20:49 This gets a lot of attraction out of women because it shows personality. It shows perseverance, drive. I'm successful and I can tell stories in an interesting way. Bam, big time value add. Now, boys, probably like seven or eight minutes has gone by already. Sometimes that's all you need to do. You talk to her. Bumble sucks, doesn't it? Yes, it does. What do you do for a living? Oh, what do you hate about that? What do you do for a living? Then you say what you do, tell a story.

21:15 That could be the whole call. But some other things we can do are, so what do you do for fun? And then she'll tell you what she does for fun. When's the last time you did that? Maybe she has a funny story about it. Then when she asks you what you do for fun, it's a very similar method, right? Three-part answer. So you say something totally stupid. I whisper motivational quotes to myself while I flex in the mirror. It's very therapeutic. Or I chase my dog around the house pretending I'm a T-Rex and he gets totally terrified.

21:38 No, a real story. I'm actually really into mountain biking. It's part of the reason I moved to Colorado. In fact, the other day I was mountain biking and this guy, he actually went off a jump, went into the tree line, and he got a fucking branch through his foot. So I actually carried him out because he couldn't walk. I had to carry this guy like he was a baby out to the road. And then the paramedics came to take him out. Mountain biking seems really innocent, but man, it can get really burly out there sometimes, really dangerous.

22:08 So what do you do for fun, right? And you change it over to her. So it's like the basic conversation. She asks you what you do for fun. You ask her, but we have interesting ways to do it. Now, as I talk about all the time in this podcast as well, you want to build some trust and connection. I like to work in that I'm really close to my mom, really close to my brother. Or if you have a pet, it's important to say how much you love that pet.

22:30 I wouldn't necessarily try to talk about your kids, but if you have them and it comes up, you can say, yeah, they're my world. I'll do anything for them. A lot of you guys are single dads. You could talk about that. You want to show that integrity, that realness, that trustworthiness that all women are attracted to. Boys, this is way more than enough to get you through the conversation. But other questions that may come up are examples like she asks you where you're from. You could say, you know that show, The Office?

22:57 Have you ever seen that with Michael Scott? And she'll say, yeah. And you'd be like, you know how it was recorded in Scranton, Pennsylvania? And she'll say, yeah, I believe I knew that. It was recorded in Scranton, Pennsylvania. You'll be like, yeah, I'm from nowhere near there. I'm actually from Newport Beach, California originally. Now I live in Morrison, Colorado. Just to kind of elicit a little bit of laughter from her. If she asks you, do you have any siblings? You'd be like, yeah, I have a brother, but he's crazy though.

23:25 He yelled at the cat because he didn't vote. He's a little bit insane. No, I'm just kidding. He's a really great guy. He actually hiked from Mexico to Canada on the Pacific Crest Trail. The guy is really gnarly. Didn't even have a tent. He just used a tarp and he made his own backpack. And he hiked from Mexico to Canada on the Pacific Crest Trail. And then he did it again on the Continental Divide Trail. And he hiked the entire Appalachian Trail. The guy is just absolutely insane.

23:49 So you want to have interesting answers to those typical things she's going to ask you and get her to talk about herself too. Now, one thing I always promote when it comes to getting on these FaceTime calls is to qualify her a little bit. Ask her, so, you know, you're obviously cute and you're obviously pretty charismatic, but what else is good about you beyond your looks? And get her to sell herself to you a little bit. This is really powerful to elicit even more attraction. Then what you can do if you're feeling it is try to close the date right there and then.

24:23 And the way you close the date is, hey, listen, you know what? I feel like we relate. I feel like we probably have some chemistry. How would you feel about hanging out sometime? Then she'll probably say yes. And then from there you say, cool, what's your week looking like? And you set up the date from there before you get off the call. It's an old sales technique. Don't let the prospect get off the call before booking your next appointment together. And this is the same thing with women.

24:41 Now you could play the card where you're like, hey, it was cool to talk to you. I got to get to that appointment now, but I'll text you and we'll catch up from there and kind of leave her hanging. But I like to close the date right there and then, especially if it went well. And if you did good, if she was laughing, if she was interested, if she felt like she was heard and there was that trust and rapport that was built, she's definitely going to go on a date with you.

25:06 And this separates you from all the other dudes who are like trying to get her to go on a date on the app. They'll send like, hey, what's up? How are you doing? Good, good, good. Hey, what are you doing on Saturday? Whereas with you, you've run all the templates that I'm going to teach you on Saturday's masterclass. You got a micro yes by getting her phone number. Then you guys got on a FaceTime call. You built up all that rapport with your charisma because you warmed up, you look good, you know what you're going to talk about.

25:34 And then you close the date right there on the call. Brothers, your chances go up exponentially. And this is what we did with Ice Age Steve, right? We had him think optimally. We had him do differently than what he was doing before, which honestly he was getting zero matches, literally zero, but we got him matches because we optimized via our testing. We understood what to send these girls and we helped him all through it as we're going to do with you. And then we got him to close the dates and he got laid three times in four months.

26:01 That was the most he's been laid in fucking decades. Ice Age Steve is a little bit older. He was married for two decades, recently got divorced. This dude's like, man, I want to get laid, but it's not working on the dating apps. So we took him in. We taught him how to do this. The same exact thing we're going to teach you on Saturday. And listen up, boys, the money that you're going to invest in this, you're going to save by skipping all the bullshit upgrades that these stupid dating apps try to make you make.

26:30 We tested for four months with 11 different dudes, not to mention the two decades of experience I've had to add to that. We are going to give you all the results and we're going to show you how to optimize so you too can have the same results that Ice Age Steve, as well as all my other boys in this experiment experienced. And that could be yours. Sign up today. Click the link in the description below and I will see you on Saturday, boys. I have another awesome one coming up on Thursday.

26:53 And I want to remind you, I'm doing a perks program where everybody who leaves me a review or tells friends about my podcast gets entered into a drawing to come into my three month coaching program for free for $0. I am doing that drawing this coming Monday on Instagram live. So if you haven't followed me yet, go below and follow me on Instagram. Monday night, I haven't decided the time yet. I'll announce that on Thursday's podcast as well as Monday's podcast. But Monday evening, I'm going to announce the winner to that.

27:24 So stay tuned for that as well. But right now, boys, your action item list is the click the link below. Get your ticket to this Saturday's masterclass. Once again, if you can't make it, you'll still get a recording of it. You're still going to get all the templates. You're going to get all the bonuses that I haven't even spoken about on my podcast yet. When you come to this masterclass, go over there to the sales page, check it out, grab your ticket. Can't wait to see you there.

27:49 This is going to be, in my opinion, the best masterclass I've ever put on. You do not want to miss this. Gentlemen, I do appreciate you listening. I draw a podcast on Mondays and Thursdays. So please stay tuned for the next one. And I will see you in the next episode. you

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.