How to Deal With a Woman Who Complains And Who Wants You to Be Her Psychologist

0:00 Welcome to The Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, my warrior brothers fighting shoulder to shoulder with me in the trenches? I do appreciate you coming to yet another ass-kicking episode of The Unapologetic Man Podcast. I sincerely appreciate you, and today we're going to talk about something that might piss off some women listening. But women, please listen to everything I have to say before you hyper-extend your vagina and send me some hate-filled email because what I'm saying here can be applied to men as well.

0:44 Because not only is it that women complain, but men complain too. It's just generally being negative, being a poor me, woes me, my life sucks, a victim, which is actually weakness. And yeah, some women are prone to that. I've dated many women who have had that, and this is the way that you're going to get past it to hopefully get them to stop bitching to you, get them to stop complaining to you, and see things in a different light because you're going to mentor them to do so.

1:12 So for the men listening, this is the strategy, but women, you can also apply this to men. At least some of the things I'm going to talk about, but this philosophy holds for both genders, so it's applicable no matter what your situation. Gentlemen, before we jump into the content, I want to read yet another testimonial for my three-month coaching program. The most effective program for learning how to seduce women in the quickest, easiest way possible, the black hole shortcut that has ever been created on planet Earth.

1:41 And yes, I stand by that. I mean that with utmost sincerity because every single client that goes through the program gets these results. So let's hear what Will has to say, and then we'll jump into the content. Will says, Mark, I've been out of the program for a couple months now, and I wanted to shoot you my testimonials. I have been pondering the words I wanted to use. I cannot thank you enough for all the work you did for me and for all of us in the program.

2:03 It was one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life. Promptly at the end of the program, I was blessed to receive a promotion at work and was rewarded with an assignment in Hawaii where I proceeded to have the best time of my life. Your program has helped me immensely with women, obviously, and I'm dating multiple high-quality girls and having the confidence that I've been searching for for years. Not only that, but I am consistently in my best state of mind thanks to the NLP.

2:31 I find myself attacking my days like a lion, like a champion, but most importantly, like a man, an unapologetic man. And for that, I am beyond grateful. Thank you again for reading this, but most importantly, for your work for men. I hope we meet someday, as do I. Will, we've met kind of virtually, but I love meeting my boys in person and definitely would love to meet you soon. So, guys, if you're interested in getting the same results that Will got, all you need to do is apply below.

2:57 Fill in the quick application. You and I are going to talk, and we'll get on a free one-hour NLP session to see if I can at least 10x your results with women, which is what I do with every single guy that comes into the program. Why? Because I deal with the bullshit inside your head with neuro-linguistic programming. I make for you a custom three-month NLP protocol that you're going to go through probably about 15 minutes per day over the three months in the privacy of your own home.

3:24 I create this specifically for you to remap belief systems, remove traumas, remove archetypes and schemas that have not been helping you with women, and make you feel like the champion that I know you are. I just need to convince you that you're that champion because when you feel that way, women are going to feel that way too, and that's what makes you attractive to women. So, gentlemen, today we are going to talk about women complaining and bitching. This is going to be something that you're going to deal with when you get good with women, inevitably.

3:53 You're going to run into the girl who, even as early as the first conversation or first date, is going to be complaining, going to be bitching, going to be treating you as her psychologist. Now, as a lot of you guys know, if you buy into that, then she's going to continue doing that because why? We teach people how to treat us. We teach people how to treat us. So, if you show her immediately that that kind of behavior will stand, such as her bitching and you just listening, wrinkling your eyebrows, staring at her mouth, and shedding a tear in your non-shooting eyes, she's going to be like, okay, great.

4:27 I have a psychologist now. Many times this makes her less attracted to you. Because why? Because you're not setting up boundaries. Guys who are good with women set boundaries. This is part of frame control, and I'm going to teach you how to do that today. So, when a woman complains to you, it is seemingly, at first, a statement of trust. I want to tell you about my problems. I want to vent to you. But, guys, there are so many red flags and pitfalls that are wrapped up into her complaining to you that you need to be extremely careful when it comes to this.

4:59 So, we're going to go over the different stages of when a woman will bitch at you, how to deal with each stage effectively, and then how to mentor her and stop the behavior so it does not continue happening. And then what to do if even that doesn't work and the chick keeps bitching, keeps complaining. The move that you're going to do to make it stop once and for all. First and foremost, boys, if a girl shows up on a first date and she's complaining to you about her mom, her boss, her car, society, Roe versus Wade, or any other political bullshit, do you think that's a red flag?

5:36 Of course it is. On the first date, in the first conversation, what are we supposed to be doing? We're supposed to be putting forward our best foot. Yet many women, for reasons I'll never understand, think that it's time to have a bitch fest. I have been on so many first dates where chicks have done this, and I'm like, oh, my hell, another one. And I've concluded the reason they do this is because they don't really have much to talk about otherwise. They're looking for substance, and they are perhaps in an emotional state of nervousness.

6:06 An emotional state of possible, some attraction, and it kicks up the dust of what's going on in their life, perhaps even some negativity, and then they talk about it. It's like when you go up to a girl and you try to think of something to talk about, you're just reaching for straws, and you'll fucking take whatever straw you can get, right? I'll talk about whatever it is I have to just to have some content. I believe oftentimes that's why women will bitch at you in the first date, talking about how their job sucks.

6:33 You ask her, for example, so what's the deal with your job? She tells you. You say, what do you love about that? And she tells you, and then she says, but here's all the shit I hate about it. My boss is an asshole. My coworkers are selfish. They're not moving me up. And I don't know why, because I've been working so hard, and I deserve a raise, and I haven't gotten it. And then she launches a snot rocket all over your shoulder, and you're like, how the fuck did I get in this situation?

6:56 I'm just trying to get laid here. I'm just trying to make out with this girl. Why is she crying on my shoulder? And now you become her wall to bitch at. You don't want that to happen. So in the first conversation or first date, here's how I suggest handling it. Listen to her for a couple minutes. Wrinkle your eyebrows. Stare at her mouth. Do not, boys, offer a solution to her problem. And I really need you to remember this. If you take one thing from this episode, let it be this.

7:23 When a woman is complaining to you, when she's venting to you, do not try to offer solutions. Do not try to solve the problem. Because we as men, we're solution-oriented. We're like, okay, so your boss doesn't appreciate you. He's not giving you a raise. Have you asked for a raise yet? Have you gone in his office and said, yo, I've been delivering good results. How about you kick me a 50-cent raise, you fucking idiot? No, she hasn't done that. And then you're like, why don't you just do that?

7:49 And she's like, you're an asshole. Why are you trying to solve my problems? And you're like, dude, I'm trying to help. And then you guys get in a fight. So trust me, when a girl is venting, shut the fuck up. It's not very hard. All you do is close that freaking pie hole of yours. You have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Shut up and listen. Here's the strategy to listen effectively to a woman. Feel your inner energy field while you're listening to her.

8:14 Which means the vibration inside your body, the energy coursing through your skin. And even if you try to feel the palms of your hands while doing this, you can feel some tingling. I myself can really feel a lot of energy in my solar plexus kind of between my pecs. Why do I suggest you do this? Because I'm telling you, she feels listened to the less you think. And it's so important. I want to say it again. She feels listened to, as well as everybody else feels listened to, by you, the less you're thinking.

8:44 What happens when we listen to most people? We're thinking about a response. We're thinking about a solution. We're even thinking about what we're going to eat that night for dinner, right? We're thinking about anything because we're impatient. We're addicted to thought. It's compulsive. But a person feels genuinely understood if you shut the hell up, not only with your words, but also your thinking. So when a woman's complaining to you the first time, maybe it's a fluke thing. Maybe she just needs to vent. Cool. I'm going to listen to her.

9:12 I'm going to stay very silent. I'm going to wrinkle my hair out, stare at her mouth, throw in a couple back channels like, uh-huh. Oh, really? And make her feel completely listened to. Now, if it continues, let's say we're on the first day of the first conversation. She's going on for five minutes, seven minutes, 10 minutes. I will interrupt her and straight tell her that, in my opinion, she's being negative and it's gone on for too long. Now, you may look at me and say, yeah, but she's going to get mad at you.

9:38 She may, but she's also going to get respect for you because, guys, don't forget that you need to control the conversation, which means lead it. Having a conversation with a woman is a lot like riding a horse. You don't power the conversation, such as you're not powering the horse. The horse is walking on its own volition, but you guide it. Guide it to the right. Guide it to the left. Pull those stirrups and be, whoa, boy, whoa, now, slow on down, buddy, when you want that horse to stop.

10:05 It's the same thing with women. If she's going in a tangent that's negative, what is she going to experience and thus relate you to? Negativity. So you let it go. You empathize, but don't make the mistake of being so weak that you're not willing to confront her about it. Now, she could get pissed, but if she does, what does that say about her? Okay, she's complaining at you, and you say, hey, listen, we've been talking about this for 10 minutes. You seem to be in a very negative state going down a negative avenue.

10:34 Why don't we change the subject for a while? Hey, have you ever heard of this thing called messages and water? And then you do the messages and water gambit. Or you're like, hey, this cool thing happened the other day. I have to tell you about it, and then get her into a better state. So in the first conversation, first date, you can let it go for a little while, and then I want you to put the kibosh on it and say, hey, we're on a first date here.

10:54 We're being really negative. Why don't we talk about something more positive? Let me ask you this. What was the best day of your life? Or let me ask you this. If you had $90 million, what would you do? Or if you had no chance of failure, what would you do with your life? Such as boys. She's bitching about her job. She hates her boss. She hates her co-workers. She hates the pay she's getting. So you let her vent five minutes, seven minutes, and you say, okay, let me ask you this.

11:17 Instead of seeping in this negativity, what would you love to do with your life? You obviously don't like that job very much. You think your boss is a dickhead. So what would you do if you had no chance of failure? Now she's talking about positive stuff. You just guided her into a better feeling. As you guys are talking, maybe you toss in some jokes. You drop some charisma bombs, as I always say. And you make her feel better. You change her state. Because on some level, that's what she wants from you.

11:44 Women always want to be in a better state as well as men. But women particularly, because they're externally validated. They're externally motivated. They get their state from outside themselves. This is why they like flowers, puppy dogs, and ice cream. Because it's an outside stimulus that makes them feel better. Here's what women want from you. They want you to have the balls and leadership to take them into a good feeling. And they will even test you by bitching about stuff they don't even really care about. So she starts bitching and moaning.

12:14 If you go on with it like, oh, I'm sorry. I can't believe that happened to you. Keep talking. Keep telling me. Then you become the friend. You become the dude who's her psychologist. She's going to continue bringing you that shit. So it's a balance, dude. You don't want to just cut it off immediately because, like I said, it could be something really important to her that she just has to talk about. So you empathize with it for about, I don't know, five, seven minutes. You feel your inner energy field.

12:39 You stay completely present. You look at her. You listen to her. Make her feel heard. And then at the right time, and you'll know the right time because there'll be a break. There'll be a certain section where she goes maybe on a different tangent. You stop it. You say, oh, let me ask you this. We've been really negative the past five minutes. I feel like you vented, and I'm happy you were able to do so. But let me ask you this. You hate your job. What would you do if you had no chance of failure?

13:05 And then you go down a different thread. Your job is to offer conversational threads. Take her down those threads. Now, this is what you also do if, say, for example, you're dating a girl. But if you're dating a girl, and you guys have been dating for several months, and this is the first instance of it, and her car was broken into, which actually happened with a girlfriend of mine. We were dating. Everything was cool. Never once complained to me. And then she came crying to my house about her car was broken into.

13:32 Do you think after seven minutes, I was like, hey, hey, stop, stop, stop. Okay. What would you do if your car didn't get broken into, and you were completely safe in the hood? How would that feel? No, dude. I listened to her. Wrinkle my eyebrows. Stare at her mouth. Be completely present. Then afterwards, give her a hug. Now, if she, for some reason, deems that, oh, I can bitch at Mark, and she does it again the next day about something completely unrelated, then I do the technique that I just said.

14:00 So, guys, it's social intelligence. You want to give them a little bit of what they're looking for from you and then put the kibosh on it when you feel it's the right moment. How do you know it's the right moment? You got to trust your instincts. I can't stand next to you in every single situation, but I will do this. If you come join me in my program, you can tell me afterwards about what happened, and I'll say whether or not you did the right thing.

14:22 And that's what I do with all my clients. In fact, this entire episode is being recorded for my boy, Nick. What is up, Nick? Because he asked me this very question. One of his girls that he's dating, and he's dating a lot of them, started bitching at him, and he's like, shit, how do I handle this? Fortunately, and this is the cool thing about getting good with women in my program, he understood fundamental principles that says, okay, I need to be a leader. I need to control the frame.

14:47 I don't want her to go down negativity, yet I want to be empathetic. I want to build trust and connection. So I'm going to do exactly what Mark said, which is listen to her about five minutes, change the subject. He actually made her laugh, made her feel better, and now he's getting laid again without all the negativity. Then I told him, should that negativity come up again, you got to put the kibosh on it. Now, this goes into something I call mentoring. Mentoring comes from mentor, I-N-G at the end, mentoring.

15:17 Mentoring a woman is extremely powerful to get her attracted to you. And it's just like it sounds. You mentor her in some way, such as teaching her how to surf, teaching her how to rollerblade, teaching her how to ride a skateboard, teaching her how to fly a kite, teaching her something about your job that you do, teaching her how to shoot a gun maybe, how to shoot a bow and arrow. All of these things are things that I've done to mentor her, to show her, for example, how to drive stick shift, which I've done with so many girls, gets them attracted to you.

15:47 Why? Because the man who teaches a woman something is doing what? He's leading. He's making her feel good. He's mentoring her. He's like a teacher. And why do all girls get attracted to their college professor? Because the man who's teaching is in the leadership role. He's controlling the frame. He's the dude who is taking her under his wing and showing her a good time. Now, what I do in this sense is, if, for example, she complained on the first date, which, guys, I've had so many girls do, I listened just like I said.

16:18 I put the kibosh on it, moved it into a better vibe, had a good time with her, and then I made a mental note. Okay, this chick tends to go down negativity. So what I did at a time when she wasn't butthurt about something, she wasn't complaining, is I told her about the law of attraction principle. What you focus on expands. That the universe is like a mirror. What you put out there comes right back to you. Then I'll talk about people who are very negative.

16:45 People who live in trailer home parks and do meth and are just yelling at each other the whole time. One of the sickest things that ever happened to me is I was getting on the freeway on my R6, which is a 600 Yamaha crotch rocket, and I was going through the turn, fucking dragging knee, going, yeah, yeah, yeah. Man, there's these two meth heads who for some reason were right on the side of the freeway. And I was on my line and I was like, holy shit, if I stay on this line, my helmet is going to be within inches of these dudes.

17:16 And I said, you know what? Fuck it, bro. Tendo, let's do it. So I hold my line and drag a knee, go right past these guys. And my buddy said that they've never seen anybody throw a conniption fit like these two fucking meth heads. They were screaming. They were yelling. They were coming all over themselves in anger. It was the funniest shit they've ever seen. But when I think of somebody very negative, I think of like meth heads in the mobile home park just yelling at each other and like super negative because of that story.

17:45 It was so sick, dude. I would definitely do it again. And I highly suggest it. Anytime you're getting on the freeway, dragging knee on your crotch rocket and there's two meth heads, hold your line, bro. Don't give up. Keep going through it. And if you accidentally hit them, meh, what the fuck were they doing on the side of the freeway? They were probably trying to cook some meth in some hole on the side of the freeway. I have no idea why they were there. And that's a funny story.

18:06 So as I was saying, if you get these people who focus on negativity, and I'm literally teaching her this, if you get a person who focuses on negativity, they're going to attract that to themselves. Now, mind you, boys, I don't say this immediately after she just complained about how her boss berated her at work today. And then immediately after you're like, just so you know, when you complain about things, it attracts more to you. I think your boss is going to continue doing that because you're putting it out there.

18:33 No, you listen to her, change the subject, forget it ever happened. Keep on the positive. Then when she's in a good mood, you offer up this teaching lesson. Have you ever heard of the law of attraction? The law of attraction dictates that our thoughts create our reality. So the more you focus on the positive, the more the positive will come to you. And the more you focus on the negative, the more the negative will come to you. What's interesting is they've actually done studies on this, where people will focus on a number, zero or a one, and consistently focus on, say, for example, zero.

19:04 And the random number generator will start popping up zero in higher percentages than popping up one. Proves the power of our thoughts. Then you can even talk about the double slit experiment, which I talked about on my episode about quantum physics. I think it was frame control, is seduction, is quantum physics, something like that. Definitely check that out. That was a sick ass episode that I recorded probably like six weeks ago-ish. All that evidence confirms that our thoughts create our reality. Now you've taught her that.

19:34 You've planted the seed. So the next time she's complaining, you listen again. You change the subject. Then maybe an hour later, you're like, hey, so let's talk about how you were complaining about your anal probe appointment. So I understand that the nurse was extremely, extremely aggressive with that anal probe. She stuck it in. You farted. It shot across the room. And you were complaining about what a bitch she was. Remember that thing we talked about, the law of attraction? Do you think that maybe on some level, you could be creating those situations in your life?

20:03 Because let's be honest, you do tend to get emotional, which I love about you. You know, you're very passionate. But do you think maybe you've possibly created some of that for yourself? Now, guys, she may get pissed off at you for saying that, but it's true, first of all. And secondly, don't buy into her frame of getting pissed off. Instead, if she's getting pissed, you'd be like, see, look what's happening right now. Like, you're getting pretty negative. Let's just relax. Let's talk this through. Don't you want to develop?

20:29 Don't you want to get to the next best version of yourself? I mean, I know for me, I used to be the most negative person in the world. And my life fucking sucked. I'm not saying you're even remotely as close as I was to this deep level of negativity, but just explore it. So let's get conscious rather than unconscious when that pain comes up. And what that pain is, is it's an accumulation of all the pain throughout your history. Since you were five years old, the accumulation creates what Eckhart Tolle, his spiritual master, calls the pain body.

20:59 It's something inside of us that's constantly wanting more negativity. Kind of feels good to complain. That's because your pain body is out. It wants more of that negativity, and it goes and feeds on it. So when you have consciousness around this, awareness alone is curative. You can see it for what it really is. You can step back from it, have perspective on it, and rise above it. Because nobody wants to feel negative, right? And she's like, oh, yeah, right. And if you can get her in the frame of accepting your coaching, accepting your mentoring, and yeah, it may blow up in your face.

21:30 And I'm going to get to that in a second. But many times they will accept your frame of mentoring her, trying to make her a better person. Boys, girls get so unbelievably attracted to a guy who has reached a higher level of consciousness than she has. And I can guarantee you if she's complaining all the time, she's still probably low vibrating and trying to bring her up to his level of consciousness. Not trying to solve her problems, just trying to mentor her to solve her own problems.

21:57 And by doing so, she's going to get ridiculously attracted to you. Now that leads me to my final point. What if she doesn't accept it? What if she keeps complaining? What if she gets mad at you when you try to mentor her? What if she completely rejects the law of attraction and everything you're trying to teach? I want to ask you this. Do you buy into the scientific fact that your thoughts create your reality? I'm asking you, bro, the guy listening. Do you buy into it?

22:22 Okay. Many of you do. How much do you buy into it? Are you like, fuck yeah, this is the way it is? Okay, cool. How much do you like it when chicks complain? I want to ask you that too. Probably for many of you, not very much. So what the fuck are you doing? If she keeps complaining and keeps rejecting what you say, why are you still with her, bro? Drop that sea donkey like a sack of potatoes. And I got to the point where any negativity came out on the first date.

22:47 I'm like, hey, I got to go. I ain't dealing with it. And a guy asked me the other night too on my coaching call. He's like, what's your relationship like with Marissa? What's Marissa like? And I'm like, she's the most positive person I've ever met. Never complains, never bitches, never goes into a victim mentality. Because that's all complaining is. It's weakness and it's being a fucking victim. Saying, poor me, I can't do this. Why, why? I hate that shit. It's low vibrating and I get rid of it immediately.

23:16 So the chick's super banging. I like her. First time I'll listen and then I'll change subjects. If it continues, I'll wait for a time to mentor her. I'll bring up the mentoring thing of the law of attraction. What you put out there comes back to you. If and when she bitches again, I'll let her get over it. And then maybe a couple hours later, I'll bring it up. If the bitching continues, if the negativity continues, and if those red flags of being a pessimistic victim continue, she's out like sauerkraut.

23:45 She's off like a prom dress. I'm blowing her out so hard. Her negativity chakra is going to launch right out of her butthole because I don't deal with that shit and neither should you guys. So how do you deal with the woman who bitches and complains and wants you to be her psychologist? You ain't her psychologist, nor will you ever be. You will listen to her on occasion. Should you be dating a girl and once every couple months she cries to you? We understand. It's life.

24:10 It's hard. And you're there for her. You listen. You focus on your inner energy field. You give her a big hug after, and then you change her state by going to have a good time. And I would say the same thing to a woman, but I'll tell you this. A dude who complains and bitches and goes into victim mentality, I bet you anything to all you women listening, you wouldn't be attracted to him in the first place because it shows a weak frame, a weak sense of reality.

24:33 If society can push him around like that and make him so emotional, how's he going to protect me, says the woman in her own mind. So if you get emotional, you boys listening, if you get butthurt easily, if you get offended, you need to work on that shit. Get a frame where nothing can affect you. Why? Outside circumstances don't matter to a man in his masculine energy. Outside circumstances matter to a man in his feminine energy. So if somebody's throwing bullshit at you, you reframe it in your head and you say, what do I think of that?

25:04 What does my filter dictate? And you only go on what's inside yourself. This is why I don't put up with women who complain. It's because I'm beyond that. I don't do that shit. First of all, it attracts negativity to myself. Second of all, it's weakness, the weakest weakness. Third of all, it's a lack of frame. And fourth of all, it makes you miserable. Why would you even screw with it? So she can complain a few times. She can vent a few times. After that, she's off like a prom dress.

25:29 See you later, masturbator. After a while, pedophile. I ain't dealing with that shit. So that's my strategy, boys. Invariably, you're going to get this. So I highly suggest you study this shit. Maybe listen to this episode again. Get your game plan in place. Because I'll tell you, the dynamic of a relationship is set within the first two weeks. Two weeks. If you let that shit happen, if you buy into it and you become her psychologist, that's how she's going to consider you for the rest of your relationship, if you even get a relationship with her.

25:59 Because many times she'll friend zone you and say, perfect, now I got a psychologist in Brian. Brian's a psychologist now and I'm not having sex with him. Where, on the other hand, if you show her your boundaries, you're not to be fucked with and this is where they're at. If you don't like it, there's the door. That's how you need to be with women, gentlemen. Here's how I am. Here's how it's going to be. If you don't like it, there's the door. Don't let the door hit you where the good Lord split you, you fucking sea bass.

26:24 That's your philosophy. In the unapologetic man army, you are not to be fucked with. And I want you to hold that for the rest of your days because you will be insanely more attractive to women. Gentlemen, I hope you got something from this episode. If you did, if you would be so kind to leave me a comment. I love the comments I've been getting on Spotify. Leave a review, please, on iTunes. Five stars, obviously, is what I prefer. As well as some writing behind it. And or come join us in the program.

26:51 At least explore what it would be like to work with me. Because not to toot my own horn, not to go down Flex Avenue, but I know what the fuck I'm talking about. I've had experience in this for decades. And what I teach works, as many of you have found. Especially every single guy who comes in my program. Let's explore it together, brother. I'd love to meet you. Apply below. For the rest of y'all, I draw podcasts on Mondays and Thursdays. So please stay tuned for the next one.

27:17 And I will see you in the next episode. Bye.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.