3 Ways to Get a Girl's Phone Number; A Step-by-Step Guide

0:00 Today, we are going to talk about phone numbers that actually stick. It's not that difficult to get a phone number. You guys have all seen it. The real question is, is she going to text you back? Because asking a girl to go on a date is a big thing. She has to get her makeup on. She has to get ready, which is why even if you get a text back from a girl, she won't always go on the date with you. So to make this real easy for you guys, I have a concept called three in five, because if you don't kill it in that first conversation, the chances of you actually getting to hook up with this girl are basically zero.

0:34 The point of this episode is to get a phone number that actually sticks, where not only will she text you back, but she'll actually go on a date with you. The Unapologetic Man Podcast. What is up, gentlemen? Welcome to another episode of the UMP. I really appreciate you stopping by. And today, boys, we are going to talk about three different ways to get a girl's phone number. Getting the phone number is one of the biggest questions I get asked from clients and listeners to the podcast.

1:01 It's not that difficult to get a phone number. You guys have all seen it. You can roll up on a girl and within seconds yank her phone number. The real question is, is she going to text you back? Today, we are going to talk about phone numbers that actually stick. I want you to get phone numbers where not only does she text you back, but she actually goes on the date with you. Because asking a girl to go on a date is a big thing. She has to get her makeup on.

1:25 She has to get ready. There's always the danger element. It's not easy for girls to go on dates with dudes, which is why even if you get a text back from a girl whose phone number you got, she won't always go on the date with you. And that comes down to the first conversation. The first conversation, boys, especially when you meet a girl in person, is probably the most important part of the seduction process because this is where she decides, am I willing to go out with this guy?

1:51 She'll probably even decide, is there a possibility I'll sleep with this guy? It's all about that first impression. And that's why not only in my podcast, but also in my three-month coaching program, I spend so much time going over what to talk about, how to elicit attraction, how to guide that conversation, and yes, boys, how to get the phone number. Because if you don't kill it in that first conversation, the chances of you actually getting to hook up with this girl are basically zero. So the first conversation is extremely important.

2:21 We need enough attraction for her to A, text us back, and B, agree to go on a date with us. So to begin this episode, the first thing we have to understand is that attraction is basically a spectrum. From the moment you open her, you have, let's say, zero attraction. To the time that you have sex with her, let's call it a hundred attraction. Now, between that time, there is the point of opening, getting attraction, getting her phone number, texting her, and then going on a date.

2:53 We understand that to get the phone number, let's say you need, and I'm just making this up out of the context of the spectrum. Let's say you need 25 points of attraction to get a phone number. You guys have seen it maybe from your friends, maybe from personal experience, or even on YouTube. These stupid videos where these guys go up and they're like, hey, what's your name? Oh, nice to meet you. Can I have your phone number? And she's like, okay, probably just to get rid of the guy.

3:19 Do you think that phone number is going to stick? Of course not. He has like maybe five points out of a hundred of attraction. She's not going to text him back. Getting a phone number is pretty easy. Getting a phone number, once again, that sticks is far more difficult. So to get the phone number, let's say we need like 25 points of attraction. But to get a text back, we need more like 40 points of attraction. And then to get an actual date, let's say we need about 60 points of attraction.

3:49 So we can get phone numbers easily, but that's not the point of this episode. The point of this episode is to get a phone number that actually sticks, where not only will she text you back, but she'll actually go on a date with you. So to make this real easy for you guys, I have a concept called three in five. And what that basically means is we want to have at least three signs of attraction. And we want to talk to her for at least five minutes.

4:15 Why five minutes? Because five minutes is, in my opinion, the minimum amount of time that a girl can get warmed up to you, get comfortable with you, and decide whether or not she actually wants to go on a date with you. If you get a phone number within a couple of minutes, which don't get it twisted, you can do, and I've done it many times because the situation, circumstances, she's on her way to the train station and I need to yank that phone number before she leaves.

4:41 Sometimes we have to do it quickly. But ideally speaking, we want a minimum of three signs of attraction and a minimum of five minutes. That might beg the question, well, what's like ideal? In the perfect situation, how many signs of attraction would you like to get? In the perfect situation, at least five, in my opinion. But three is like the bare bottom minimum. I want five, seven, 10, 20, a thousand signs of attraction if I can get them, but three is the minimum. What's the ideal situation as far as time is concerned?

5:14 Probably about 10 minutes, 15 minutes. But again, the more you can hang out with her, like let's say you guys hang out for two hours because your two friends groups meet and you guys are hanging out for the whole night. That's even better. The more time we can have to build that rapport, that trust, connection, and attraction, the better. I'm talking even weeks, months, which is what I call a campaign. A really hot girl who has guys all over her all the time, it could take weeks, months.

5:44 I mean, years, that's a little ridiculous, but you know what I mean, where it's going to take more time, which is why the long play, which is actually the podcast I'm doing on Monday. So stay tuned for that. Hopefully my voice will be healed by then. The long play is the better play. But here we're talking about getting a phone number from a girl that perhaps you met at the supermarket, at the bookstore, at Starbucks, at a nightclub, at a bar, at a happy hour, out to dinner, on the street.

6:10 As you're doing day game, we want three signs of attraction. We want a minimum of five minutes talking to her. That's the base minimum to hopefully get a text back and of course, hopefully get her to come on a date with us. So what are three obvious signs of attraction? Playing with her hair, licking her lips, asking your personal questions, laughing at jokes that aren't funny, leaning in, open body language. Scratching the inside of her wrists, which is actually a primate, unconscious activity that primates do when they're attracted.

6:45 Putting one foot in front of the other, which is also an unconscious thing that girls do. General deer in the headlights look, blushing, playing with her clothes, playing with their jewelry, complimenting you, asking you lots of questions, including what are you doing this weekend? What do you like to do for fun? Do you have a girlfriend? Okay, so those are signs of attraction. How many do we need? Three minimum. Three minimum, boys. If you get less than that, and I know some girls are subtle, but if you get less than that, you might be able to pull a number, but you're probably not going to get a date.

7:19 So we want three minimum and we want five minutes minimum of talking to her to build rapport, to build trust, to build connection, to build it so that she actually remembers you. So the three and five technique means three signs of attraction, five minutes minimum before you ask for the phone number. Let's get into the techniques of actually asking for the number. But before we do that, I also want to touch upon what we call qualifying. Qualifying means you make her work for you because if you approach a girl and you're basically just a dancing monkey the whole time, entertaining her, cracking her up, doing lots of good game, but you don't get her to game you at all.

7:59 You don't ask her any questions like, what would you do with $100 million? Or what would you do without any chance of failure? Or the qualifying question of, what would your best friend say is the coolest thing about you? She's probably going to think to herself, why does he want my phone number? This guy came up. He was super attractive, super entertaining. Yeah, I was attracted to him, but why does he want me? Oh, obviously because I'm pretty. All he wants to do is sleep with me.

8:27 I'm not going to text him back. So the thing you have to remember is, yes, we want three signs of attraction, but we also ideally want her to game us a little bit, her to prove to us why we like her. Therefore, when we text her, she's going to be like, okay, he likes me for more than just my looks. So when you're talking to the girl, turn it back on her. Let her game you a little bit. Ask her those questions. Have her tell you a story.

8:54 Have her teach you something even. And ask her those qualifying questions. What would your best friend say is the coolest thing about you? What's good about you beyond your looks? Or my favorite one, do you know why you're awesome? And she's like, why? And you say, it was a question. Dumb, dumb. And then she laughs and tells you why she's awesome. So we have to qualify her first. We want at least three signs of attraction. We want to be in the mix for at least five minutes, preferably 10, 15, even 20.

9:21 The longer you're in there, provided you don't overstay your welcome and you're still entertaining and provided you're still building attraction consistently, the higher chances you have of getting a text back, a conversation, a date, and her showing up on the date. So you make her qualify herself. And when she does, I always say this. I always say, dude, that's really awesome. You just went up 20 points in my book. You're now at negative 300. Congratulations. And like give her a fist bump. She's going to be like, shut up.

9:50 And you'd be like, nah, I'm just kidding. Honestly, that's really cool. I like that about you. You're loyal. You're a good friend. That's cool. So we reward her for having jumped through our hoop. We have those signs of attraction. We've been talking to her for several minutes where the rapport is there. And then you say one of these three things. First of all, and this is one of my favorite ones. Very simple. Hey, I enjoy talking to you. You seem pretty cool. Why don't you toss me your number and we'll catch up some other time?

10:17 Why don't you toss me your number and we'll catch up some other time? It's assumptive. It's laid back. The language is kind of like, yeah, just throw me your number. No big deal. This has a very high close rate. So again, it's, hey, I enjoy talking to you. You seem pretty cool. Why don't you toss me your number and we'll catch up some other time? I enjoy talking to you. I got to get going right now. Why don't you toss me your number and we'll text each other?

10:41 There's a bunch of variations, but it's kind of like, hey, I approve of you. I got to get going right now. Why don't you toss me your number and we'll do this more some other time? In that vein, there's another one I like to do, which is making her suggest giving the phone number. You basically say, hey, I got to get going right now. What would you suggest we do to continue this conversation some other time? Then she says, well, I can give you my number.

11:07 And you say, oh, it's a good idea. Here. And you hand her your phone. So again, it's what would you suggest we do to continue this conversation some other time? And the third one, boys, hand her your phone. Once you've opened up the contacts list for the first name, put down hurricane and then have the space bar there for her to finish the first name. So it's going to be hurricane and her first name, hurricane Ashley, hurricane Amy. And what you do is you just hand her your phone.

11:36 So while you guys are talking, you take out your phone, you hit open contacts, create new contact, type in hurricane, then hand it to her. She's going to look at your phone confused. And she's going to be like, what is this? And you'll be like, put your phone number in it, dum-dum. And she's going to be like, hurricane. You'll be like, yeah, hurricane Ashley. Put your phone number in there, hurricane Ashley. And she's going to crack up. Now, when doing this, if you guys are exchanging phones, you can put your phone number into her phone.

12:06 And what I always do is I always put sex machine. So sometimes I'll be like, here, toss me your phone. Let's exchange numbers. And you give her your phone while it does say hurricane, or you could just open the contacts list and just hand her your phone. But I like to do that when she hands me her phone. I like to put like hurricane Ashley, hurricane Amy, hurricane Jessica, whatever it is. When she hands me her phone, I like to put sex machine or like Captain Crunch or like Lord Robithan, whatever you think is funny, put that into her phone.

12:39 She may not even see it that night at the nightclub or bar or party or whatever. But when you text her, it's going to be like, Lord Robithan, who the hell is this? And then you say something funny, as I always talk about in my podcast to elicit those emotions you guys had when you first met, bam, set up the date. So once again, boys, do not forget the technique. Three in five. Three signs of attraction, five minutes minimum, three in five. Minimum three signs of attraction, minimum five minutes speaking to her.

13:13 The three different ways to get their phone number. Let's review them again. Hey, you seem pretty cool. Why don't you toss me your number? We'll catch up some other time. Number two is, hey, I got to get going right now. What would you suggest we do to continue this conversation some other time? And the third way is, hand her your phone with the contact list already pulled up. Her first name has the word hurricane that you typed in there with a space ready for her to put her first name.

13:41 She's like, what's this? You'd be like, oh, put your name in there, Hurricane Ashley. And she's like, oh my God, I can't believe you did that. Elicits a lot of attraction. Now, something I like to say before I leave, which always cracks them up, is, hey, listen, I promise to text you 500 times in a row at three o'clock in the morning until your cell phone overheats and burns a hole in your purse. Or, hey, listen, no calls after 2 a.m. I get enough of those as it is.

14:04 I know you're a stalker, Texas Ranger, but relax with the incessant texting. It's just too much. Or relax with the good night, honey, phone calls at 2 a.m. I don't need it. Okay, so you're proving that you're the prize. You get numbers all the time, but at the same time, she's special because you often don't do this. And that's something I'll say, too. I'll be like, you know what? I never do this, but I really enjoy talking to you. How would you feel about tossing me your number?

14:31 And that's another way you could do it. So take what I said. Take the one that works best for you, the one you feel best about, and then break that out into you asking for phone numbers from this point forward. Here's a final tip, boys. If you don't know, you should still go. Which basically means even if you don't have the three signs of attraction, even if you didn't talk to her for a minimum of five minutes, still go for it because you never know. And some girls are very subtle.

14:58 I feel like I can read most girls. I can just tell when they're attracted, even down to the point where I'll let the conversation drop. She's still standing there wanting to talk to me. Why is she still standing there? Because she's attracted. So while you may not get the signs, while you may not have the five minutes of great attraction ramping conversation, you should still go for it. Because as my old pal Eric always said, if you don't go, it's always a no. So you might as well try.

15:27 But ideally speaking, we have the three and five. Minimum three signs of attraction. Minimum five minutes. Text her the next day at 6 p.m. If you do those charming ways to get her phone number, it's going to build attraction that much more. And who knows? You may get a date out of it. And once you get good, once you can really read signs, you're going to be like, yeah, I don't even think this chick would text me back. I'm not going to even ask. But in the beginning, I want you guys to ask.

15:53 Because again, if you don't know, you never know. Until you get really good, until you can read girls like you're literally reading their mind, just try. But eventually you'll get so good where you're like, dude, I got like one sign of attraction. It's been like three minutes. I got to get going. I don't feel like this girl's really into it. I'm just going to save her and myself the wasted time of exchanging numbers. Because why do girls oftentimes give their numbers? To get rid of you.

16:20 So as you improve, your discernment gets better and you ask for less numbers. But those numbers, when you ask for them, have a super high close rate. Because you know what to do and you know how to do it. Gentlemen, stay tuned for my podcast on Monday. I'm sure by that time my roached voice will be healed. I got a really good one. Why you should play the long game with girls. How to play the long game without going into the friend zone. How to nurture attraction.

16:47 And this is specifically for really high quality girls who aren't going to just hook up with you after a little bit of attraction who are way more discerning, way more picky. The long game. That's what we're going to talk about on Monday. So stay tuned for that one. And I will see you in the next episode. What is up, brother? Just wanted to thank you sincerely for watching this episode. If you've gotten any value whatsoever out of my content, the single best way to help me is to like, comment, subscribe, leave me a review.

17:18 You have no idea how much that helps me. Also, if you're struggling with women and you want to talk to me personally about how I can help you achieve your goals with women, sign up for my three-month coaching program below and you and I will talk. Join us in the unapologetic army.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.