10 Do's & Dont's For Your Dating Profile Pictures

0:00 Yet another unsolicited review for the NLP included in my three-month coaching program. Check this out, boys. Because you gave me my protocol like earlier this week and I started going through it. My brain feels awesome. I've done therapy for like years and I've done so many different like methods and like I've done all this stuff. But like last night was my, the belief that like hot girls are too good for me. It was like number two. Dude, I was laying there and I was like imagining it and my brain was just like connecting all these dots.

0:30 I'm like, okay, like I can see this moment I had with this girl in high school and then like my mom and my sister and like all this stuff. And I was like, how do these all connect? Damn, dude, I feel powerless before women. That's like the real belief. And then like I got like so pissed off when I was kicking all the things out of the sand. And it was just like it felt so good. And like I was laying there afterwards and I did like the saturation and my brain just felt new.

0:54 Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast. The only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, gentlemen? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP. Today, we are talking about 10 do's and don'ts for your dating profile pictures. Guys, your pictures on the dating apps are absolutely going to make or break your success on the dating apps. Now, I know a lot of you listening absolutely hate the dating apps. I hear it time and time again from my clients.

1:34 They're difficult, man. And I'm not going to lie to you. I'm not going to blow smoke up your ass. They fucking suck. And they are heavily, heavily swayed in the favor of women. Women have all the advantage on dating apps. Did you guys ever see the post on Instagram and TikTok where it's like Jabba the Hutt? And in the picture, it's a female and she's wearing lipstick, Jabba the Hutt is, and a wig. And Han Solo is standing there and Jabba the Hutt is like, how tall are you?

2:02 Implying that even these heifers, these mountain trolls, these New York rump roasts are trying to be the selector when they themselves are not very attractive. Yeah, that's because dating apps fucking suck and they are completely and utterly at the advantage of women. That being said, gentlemen, some men absolutely crush it on the dating apps. And what's the difference? It's always their pictures. So even if you're not very good looking, even if you're not very tall, you can still get really good success on the dating apps.

2:32 And once you have some success, it's almost like an avalanche. And this is how it works in dating in general. When you get good with women, it's like all the women want you. When you get good on the dating apps, all those girls on the dating apps want you too. So it's all about stacking the chips in your favor and it comes down to your pictures, boys. Guys ask me all the time, like, what kind of stuff should I write in my profile? And I do give a lot of that.

2:56 In fact, I give templates upon templates about how to set up your dating profile. But really, boys, compared to the pictures, it doesn't matter that much. We have tested all kinds of different combinations from being serious to being really playful to being completely and utterly fucking psychotic. And usually it makes very little difference. The pictures are the most important thing. So we're going to go over 10 do's and don'ts about the pictures. And gentlemen, as I always say, especially lately, stay tuned until the end because the very last one is absolutely something that I used to do in my dating app pictures that screwed me over so many times.

3:34 And I didn't even realize it and I'll tell you, probably about 90% of you guys are doing this. So make sure to stay tuned until the end. Let's get into the content. First of all, boys, you have to use a professional photographer. Yes, I said it. I know it's a Hasselhoff. I know it's going to cost you money. But if you have the shitty ass blurry pictures that are not professional and polished looking, you are going to have abysmal results on the dating apps. So a professional photographer who preferably is a woman and who has done this for guys before.

4:09 You can find people like this advertising on certain websites like Craigslist. But the best place that we found is a website called Thaum Tech. And preferably, boys, get a girl and preferably an attractive girl because attractive girls are usually a little more in the know. And they can tell you their own opinion as to what kind of outfits you should wear, what kind of poses you should have, how to look the most attractive to other women viewing you on those dating sites. In addition to this, you want to have good lighting.

4:40 She doesn't necessarily have to bring lighting with her, although some really good photographers will do that. A basic thing to note is the golden hour. And the golden hour is right about the time that the sun sets. That's when the light is going to represent your features the best. There aren't going to be any hard shadows. Perhaps some of your wrinkles are going to be less defined. The golden hour, once again, is at sunset. So what I would usually do is time the photographer to come out at that time.

5:09 I'd have several different outfits that I'd be wearing to show lifestyle, as I'm going to talk about in a moment, showing that I'm a high value guy. One thing to avoid, and I've noticed this sometimes with certain guys who try to do this, is the overly polished pictures where it's like in a studio. And it looks like you're posing for like some 1980s album cover. And it's just like way too polished. Like she's putting fucking Vaseline on the lens. That's going too far. What you want it to look like is slightly impromptu, but the pictures are high quality.

5:41 And obviously, boys, you want to be well-dressed and you want to show lifestyle, which is number two. You want to show a lifestyle that she wants to join in on. She wants to up her status. Think about what humans want. They always want the upgrade plan. They want a dude who has a cool lifestyle, who has a fun life, who's social, who's attractive to women, and who basically lives a kick-ass life. And she wants to come in on that. She ultimately wants to be your sidekick.

6:09 She wants to join your life, not be your life. And if a woman deduces that she's higher value than you are, and women's value obviously is highly based on looks, she's not going to want to bond with you. She's not going to want to connect with you. She's not going to go on a date with you. So you need to communicate a high-value lifestyle. Yes, boys, even if you have to stretch the truth a little bit. And when it comes to the dating apps, people are lying like a fucking politician.

6:34 Women are editing their photos. They're using pictures from like 10 years ago. They are making themselves look as attractive as humanly possible because women usually understand that their attractiveness on the dating apps is largely based on their looks. Well, guys lie too. And I'm going to be totally honest with you, boys. I lied out of my fucking teeth, dude. I said I was taller than I was, made more money than I did. And you guys should do the same. Just being honest with you. If you're a certain age and you want to date girls that are way younger, if you put your real age, just being honest, you do what you have to do.

7:07 But if you put your real age, a lot of girls are going to filter you out automatically. In fact, there's filters on the dating apps, as a lot of you guys know, where the woman puts what's her maximum age. So would I lie about my age? Did I lie about my age? Fuck yes, I did. I'm not telling you to do that. You have to work within your moral compass. But my philosophy was this. Well, what if I miss meeting a girl who I really connect with?

7:32 Then when I would meet said girl and we would get along really well, I would eventually tell her, hey, I'm actually 10 years older than what I said I was. They would get pissed off for a few minutes. But because they were so attracted to me, they would eventually forgive me. In my opinion, it's better to ask for forgiveness rather than permission, especially on the dating apps where lying is kind of just expected. Now, of course, boys, you have to work within your own moral compass. But to me, neglecting to meet a girl because my age or perhaps for you guys, even your height was not good enough for her is stupid because I could be depriving her of a really good relationship with me.

8:11 Guys, I've dated girls that were decades younger than I was, and we got along great. So why would I let my age prevent that? Well, when it comes to your pictures, maybe you have to kind of stretch the truth a little bit. Maybe it looks like you dress more nicely than you actually do on a day-to-day basis. I know as I'm sitting here recording this podcast, I'm literally wearing pajama bottoms and a black shirt that I got for like seven bucks and a fucking hat I had custom made.

8:37 Sometimes I dress more nicely. Sometimes I don't. But in the dating apps, I want her to think this guy's polished. This guy's dialed. He has a lifestyle that I want to be a part of. And when it comes to lying boys, that's up to your discretion. The way I think about morality is this. If it's not creating suffering for myself and for others, then it's okay. If it is creating suffering for myself and for others, then it's not okay. It's a very basic way. I look at morality when it comes to life.

9:05 But saying I'm a few inches taller or a few years younger, is that really hurting anybody? No, it isn't. And is taking professional polished pictures where I'm dressing perhaps a little bit better than I usually do hurting anybody? No, it isn't. It's going to increase your results. Number three, boys, have social proof. And this goes into number two. Social proof means you have a high-value lifestyle. You do cool shit. You know cool people. You have access to resources. This should be represented in your pictures. I'm not telling you to go rent one of those fake private jet studios.

9:40 Have you guys seen this shit where you could take a picture of you in a private jet and all it is is like a fake studio? This is literally what influencers are doing. I'm not telling you to go to that extreme. But perhaps if you're at a nice location, take a picture there. Perhaps if you happen to have a nice car, take a picture with it. Yeah, it seems shallow. And it may seem like we're placating the gold diggers and women who are after us for the wrong reasons.

10:04 But this is what gets attraction. It's showing resources, showing a lifestyle, showing social proof. If I took a picture with Leonardo DiCaprio, damn right I'm putting that on my dating profile. Because it shows that this guy's high-value. He knows high-value people. And as shallow as it may seem, women are attracted to social proof. They're attracted to dudes who have a high-status lifestyle. Number four, if you have a good body, display your physique in a way that doesn't look try-hard. One of my don'ts that I'm going to talk about is the old gym selfie in the mirror.

10:40 Get rid of that shit, boys. It is try-hard. It looks low-value. It looks thirsty. Instead, what you want to do is be captured doing some kind of activity when you happen to have your shirt off. Or you're wearing a tight shirt where the glamour muscles are coming out, the chest buys and tries. That shows her you have a good physique. So if you are ripped, we want to show that in a definitive way. One of the best pictures that's ever performed on a recent study that a guy did was him, shirtless, ripped, holding a puppy, smiling, looking at the camera.

11:15 That shit performed like no other. And on that note, you should beta test your main picture, which of course, boys, should be you smiling at the camera alone, nobody else around, looking as handsome as possible, well-dressed, good lighting, polished picture, showing some personality, showing some confidence. So if you have a good physique, definitely show it, but don't look like you're trying to show it, which is one of the underlying rules of everything I teach in this podcast. Number five is to smirk or smile with confidence.

11:47 What I always tell my clients is this. Look at the camera as if you're looking at her and saying, girl, you have no idea who you're dealing with. I am going to show you the best time ever. I am going to take you under my wing and absolutely blow your mind. I am going to give you a world-class experience. And while we get in bed, you have no idea what's coming to you. I literally want you boys to think that as you're looking at the camera.

12:14 Now, is this difficult? Fuck yes, it is. I've done, what is it now, 668 episodes. I still feel a little weird staring at a fucking camera as I'm talking, but you get used to it. And one of the tricks that I use is I pretend that camera lens that I'm literally looking at right now is somebody's face, a friendly face. Or in the case of taking pictures, a girl who really wants you and you're kind of smiling at her like, little girl, you have no idea what you're getting into.

12:43 You sure you can handle this? I'm not so confident you can. That's the vibe. And you need to have that thought in your head when you're looking at the camera. Yeah, you're going to feel like a dweeb sleeve. But dude, you have to fucking do it to get results. And here's the trick, boys. If you hire a photographer, which God bless America, you absolutely should, have her take 500, 700, 1,000 fucking pictures and choose literally the best 5, 10, 15. Show them to your friends and they can help you pick the best ones.

13:11 When you come into my three-month coaching program, this is a service that I offer. I have my three hottest friends, Marissa, Alicia, and Lindsey go through all your pictures and choose the best ones in the right order to get you the best results. And yes, it works. I often say to my clients, yo, never ask a fish how to catch a fish, which basically means never ask a woman for dating advice. But when it comes to the best kinds of pictures, that is when I'll ask the fish how to catch a fish.

13:39 And I'll ask my girlfriends, what are the best pictures for this guy? And they're like a little sewing circle coming together and giggling and saying, oh, he's cute. And by the way, boys, I've been wanting to mention this. I have hooked up so many of my clients with my hot friends. It's absolutely ridiculous. Actually, I've kind of been thinking about maybe having a service where when a client comes into my program, I introduce them to some of my friends. But unfortunately, I don't have friends all over the world or even all over the United States.

14:08 But when it comes to like Colorado dudes, I've hooked up many of my clients with my girlfriends because I know a lot of chicks. And when guys get game in my program, my girls want to meet those guys. And I've made many, many clients very happy by doing that. But again, boys, have a girl go through your pictures, tell you which ones to use. If you come into my program, my girlfriends are going to do that for you. One really gangster thing is to actually look off camera.

14:35 And that's number six. Have you guys noticed that with pictures that take place on the red carpet, for example, where there's famous Hollywood actors coming on to the red carpet, the actors are usually not looking at the camera. They're taking a picture with somebody else. And then you have some off to the side camera that takes a picture of them not looking at the camera, which is why I tell my clients one of the most gangster pictures you can have on your Instagram profile is you with a couple of hot girls.

15:06 They're looking at you and you're looking off camera or they're looking at the camera, but you're not. You're kind of looking away or looking elsewhere. It shows high value. So a couple of pictures of like your profile, if you have a good profile or you, for example, on a red carpet and somebody's taking a picture of you from the side shows so much value. And this goes into number seven on the do's section. And guys, again, stay tuned for the don'ts. I got a couple of really funny ones.

15:35 And the last one's really, really important. You do not want to miss it. So number seven is do you go candid over posed. And what that means is action shots like you walking, laughing, playing sports, mid conversation with somebody where you don't even realize somebody's taking a picture of you. Remember, women want the feeling of the moment, not necessarily the flex of the moment. All right, the next one, number eight, is do have one super stylish one, bro, where you're in the three-piece noose or the fucking tuxedo looking the absolute best you can, maybe leaning on a bar, talking to somebody, maybe giving a speech.

16:14 I had that once in my dating profile, got so much action where I was on stage dressed to the nines, giving a speech. I was actually doing some dating coaching on stage at that time, and oh, my hell, that thing got me laid because it showed value. It showed I dressed well. I'm handsome. I'm on stage, public speaking. People are listening to me. Look at that value punch. That's the way you guys want to think. Think outside the box. Instead of having pictures of like you in the AYSO soccer van or of you outside the rub and tug joint called the Kung Pao Jerkin, you instead want to have pictures of you doing some high-value shit.

16:52 You don't want to have the picture of your mug shot, for example, after you went into the rub and tug joint called the Handy Panda, and you were getting a table shower, and you got so fired up, you spit on the poor girl's leg, and then the police were called, and you were hauled off to jail, and you're like, here's my phony mug shot of you looking like an absolute fucking freak. You want to leave that shit out, boys. High value, high value, high value. Here's a tip for you.

17:18 If it's still on Netflix, there's a movie about a dude who I think it's called the Tinder Swindler or something like that. It's a dude who basically was on Tinder, yanked a ton of girls, pretended that he was rich, pretended he had a lot of money, got all these girls, then basically stole all the money from them. Now, obviously, I'm not telling you to do that. What I'm telling you to do is to look at his pictures. When they showed his profile, I was like, yes, dude, that's exactly what you want to look like.

17:47 Now, obviously, he was flexing money. Obviously, he was like flexing private jets and like Gucci and Louis Vuitton and shit. You don't have to do that, but look at his style. Look at the pictures, how they were polished. He's looking off camera. He fucking nailed it. So check out that movie because not only can you get some good ideas for your pictures, but it's also really interesting. The next one, boys, pictures with pets, as I talked about, shows trust, connection. You can be trusted. Also, I like to include a picture with my mom just to show that I'm good to women because I love my mom.

18:21 And something where I'm looking handsome, she's looking good. You can tell we have a good relationship. Very powerful. So get that professional photographer. Work out with her the kinds of pictures that you're going for. I suggest a variety of different outfits, and it may take even a couple of different sessions to get the right pictures. But guys, if you want to succeed in this game, you have to take it to the next level. You have to be the guy who's different from all the other schleps that put a bunch of iPhone pictures on their dating apps of them doing boring or even creepy as shit like them standing outside an Asian massage parlor called the Kung Pao Jerkin, and they think that they're going to get girls with that.

19:01 It's like, come on, bro. Think outside the box. We're playing chestnut checkers. And this, too, is why when you come into my program, I give you templates to send chicks. Did you guys hear on my other podcast? My buddy's like, dude, I sent a text to this girl. She didn't respond. I unsent it, then sent what you, Mark, told me to say, and she responded within a few minutes. Guys, that's because I have experience. I know what the fuck I'm doing. Now, if you're not going to come join me in my program, here's a request I have for you.

19:28 Tell your friends about this podcast. If you do that, I have a perks program where, by the way, I will give you said templates for the dating apps. That's right. If you tell a certain number of friends about this podcast, I will give you all my best templates for the dating apps that get result after result after result paired with what I'm talking about in this episode about the kind of pictures to take. If you have the right messages, brothers, it's going to be a pussy avalanche.

19:57 Here's the thing. A lot of guys get zero success on the dating apps. That's because only a few guys get unprecedented success on the dating apps. I will teach you how to do so. Even if you look like shit, even if you're five foot two and your penis looks like a tiny little mushroom growing out of your ball sack, I will still get you those girls because of presentation. Presentation is everything. There's a study that shows people who wear makeup to work, particularly women, women who wear makeup to work make more money.

20:28 Think about that. This is how shallow we are as human beings. Looks, perceived value, social status. This is all the stuff that gets attention from women and all you have to do, boys, is tell a few friends about my podcast and I will send you templates that will get you messages, that will get you dates, that will get you laid so you don't have to go to the Asian massage parlor, the handy dragon, and get your tiny little mushroom jerked off because you're going to actually get girls in real life.

20:57 By the way, I keep talking about Asian massage parlors because my last episode was all about that. If you didn't hear it, listen to it. It was absolutely hilarious. I tell a bunch of stories about it and it's fucking crazy. So go check that out if you haven't listened. All right, boys. Now, 10 don'ts. Damn, this is getting long. I'm already like 22 minutes in. All right, let's get to it. Don't post selfies. Should be self-explanatory. Absolutely unacceptable. No fucking selfies. You understand me? God damn it, you idiot.

21:26 Do not post selfies. Number two, don't wear sunglasses in every photo. A couple of them, okay. I would say even maybe just one so you could show off your epic sunglass face, which by the way, I got a pretty good sunglass face myself. One, bro. But not in every photo, definitely. Not in your profile photo, the main photo. You got to be looking at the camera, smiling, confident, good lighting, good outfit, very clear how you look. Nobody else in the picture. Remember that one. Number three, don't be too try hard.

22:00 This should go without saying, boys. No flexing, no posing like you're modeling for a cologne. Be cool, not cringy. So impromptu pictures, pictures where it looks like you're just being captured in your natural habitat, as it were, so these chicks can see what a high-value dude you are. Don't use filters or overly edited photos. You guys have seen them. Chicks do this all the time. Where she's a freaking canyon mule, and she puts one filter on it, and suddenly she looks like Megan Fox. And then you show up to the date, and you're like, where's Megan Fox?

22:32 All I see here is a fucking canyon mule, a Nebraska heifer, a New York rump roast. I don't want that shit. And you don't want to do the same thing either. Next one, don't use blurry pics from your 2010 iPhone. Went over this already, boys. You want clear photos where she can clearly see what you look like. Don't use gym mirror selfies. I mentioned that one. And don't be the drunk guy. Every single picture is you with a fucking Budweiser. Looks very low value. While some girls like to party, they want to know that you're responsible, and you're not just a drug-using alcoholic who's going to steal all her money, just like that dude did on the Tinder swindler.

23:14 All right, guys, the next one, and I can't believe I have to tell you this, but it's still happening even in 2025. No pictures of you with the fucking fish. And believe me, boys, I've caught some epic fish. I'm a big fly fisherman. The best moment of my life is when I saw a fish rising and taking flies off the surface, and then I dropped my fly, boop, perfectly in front of his face, timing it right when he rise, and he took that shit, and I fucking caught him, got him in my net.

23:39 He was a big-ass motherfucker too, and I was holding him, got the picture, and I'm like, man, I should really post this on my dating profile because it shows that I'm a man and I can provide, but all it makes you look like is a fucking idiot. So do not post pictures of you with fish. Do not post pictures of you with that bull elk that you killed with your fucking arrow, that 360 bull that you want to brag about. Some girls aren't going to like that, bro.

24:05 And even though you may say to me, yeah, but I want a girl who hunts. Just keep that extreme shit on the down low, right? Like if you're like super-duper Christian, and unless you want to limit yourself to only Christian chicks, like keep the fucking gigantic two-foot cross necklace off your chest in your pictures. Let's reduce the things that are going to blow us out because of belief systems, right? Like your MAGA hat. I get it, boys. You like Trump. But if it would prevent you from meeting a super hot girl or prevent you from being able to practice with a bunch of different chicks, wouldn't you agree it's best to leave that out?

24:39 Maybe you don't agree with me. If you don't, then wear the MAGA hat. Just letting you know it's going to limit your results. Or you're like at some hippie circle playing the harp, and you're wearing some Biden hat. Listen, if that's the kind of girl you want to go for, then go for it. Just letting you know it's going to limit your results. The next one, don't smile like a salesman, that ear-to-ear grin showing nothing but fucking teeth. Take it easy, boys. A nice, wry smile or even a grin is enough.

25:05 You don't want to look like a salesman. And on that note, you don't want to look like a serial killer. So if you're going through your pictures and you're like, yeah, man, it looks like in this picture, I'm kind of telling women that I want to eat their liver with a nice bottle of Chianti and some Farver beans. And maybe I shouldn't telegraph that. So be willing to leave pictures out. If it's questionable, leave it out. Only put in the hell yeses. And you can have few pictures, man, as little as four.

25:33 That's the minimal amount that I suggest. The best amount is like five to six, maybe seven. So right in that about five, six picture range, that's where you want to be. And the last one, boys, and this is the mistake that I made, do not crop out ex-girlfriends with their hair clearly over your shoulder and their arm over your other shoulder. The girl knows that you cropped out an ex's picture. It creeps them out. Now that goes into the concept of pre-selection. Should I have pictures of women with me?

26:02 Here's the thing that I found, guys. On the dating apps, you want to be very careful with this because as a lot of you guys know, women are so effing hypersensitive on the dating apps, they're like on a hair trigger. You say one little thing wrong and they ghost you because again, they're freaking Jabba the Hutt's thinking that they're high value and asking Han Solo how tall he is. So be very careful about girls in your pictures. You can have maybe like one or two pictures with girls who are like in the scene, but just be very careful not to put off the fuck boy vibe, the this was my ex-girlfriend vibe, or again, cropping out friends, even guy friends.

26:41 Just like the crop pictures, it just looks like you put no effort into it. It looks unattractive. You want to get the professional pictures taken, the impromptu ones, the ones where you're showing high value, high status lifestyle, you're in the know, and again, a lifestyle that she wants to become a part of, not a lifestyle that's based on her. That's what we need to telegraph in our pictures, boys. So get to it. Go hire a professional photographer. Have her take like 500 pictures. Yeah, it's going to be a couple hundred bucks, but are you seriously that cheap that you're not going to drop a few hundred bucks into your success and instead waste it on prostitutes or the rub and tug station down at your local city corner?

27:23 Of course, you don't want to do that. You want to get real girls, gentlemen. And listen, if you tell your friends about my podcast, I'm going to send you those online dating templates that have proven successful time and time again, which combined with these new pictures that you're about to take are going to 10X, 20X, 50X your results with women. It's all about playing chestnut checkers, boys. It's all about doing this thing smartly, not being a lazy corn sloth because that's going to keep your dick dry.

27:52 And the only time it gets wet is when you're in the shower. We're going to rename your dick Sahara Joe because the thing is so dry, it's going to audition for the next movie of Dune. So boys, get to it with the pictures. I super appreciate you listening. Before you go, click the link below. It's the first link. It's called the Perks Program. Check that out. See what I'm giving. And one of the things that I'm giving are, again, templates to message chicks to get you unprecedented success on the dating apps.

28:20 Help a brother out. This podcast grows by word of mouth. So if I've done well for you, help me out, man. Tell your friends about it. Yeah, even if you're a little bit embarrassed that you listen to a podcast like this one, it's a good podcast and it can help out your friends. And honestly, if you care that much about what people think of you, if you're that worried about your reputation, maybe that social experiment will be good for you. Pushing yourself outside your comfort zone and saying, look, I'm trying to improve myself.

28:46 I'm trying to get more girls. Check out this podcast, bro. It's really good. And once again, I'm going to send you more cool shit than you'll believe, man. I'm really going to hook you up. I love to over deliver. So please do that now, boys. Help me out. I'm trying to grow this shit. And I do appreciate you listening. As a reminder, I draw podcasts on Mondays and Thursdays. So please stay tuned for the next one. And I will see you in the next episode. I'll see you in the next one.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.