5 Secret Techniques for Approaching Women No One Ever Talks About

0:00 I like to get deep into these things. I like to give you guys the best information possible. I want to leave you today with tactile tips, actual techniques, and things you can do to improve your chances of not only having good interactions with women, but walking away with phone numbers that actually stick. Phone numbers where she's going to not only text you back, but also want to go on a date with you. And if you implement the five secrets that I'm going to share with you today, more likely seven or eight, because I always over-deliver, then you too will get success.

0:31 The Unapologetic Man Podcast. What is up, you champions? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP. I super appreciate you stopping by. And today, boys, I am going to reveal five secrets that it seems like nobody ever talks about when it comes to approaching a woman. Before I jump into the content, gentlemen, I have to remind you that this weekend, the weekend of April 25th, I am doing an NLP masterclass, neuro-linguistic programming, the same magic that turns all my clients into girl magnets.

1:02 We have a 95% success rate. Think about that for a second. 95% of my clients get success with women, not because of my techniques, although those are good too, but because I do deep level programming in the psychology to remap belief systems, metaprograms, archetypes, and I'm doing that this weekend, the weekend of April 25th. We have sold out several different times, and I get all these emails from people crying because they're peanut butter and jealous of everybody else who got their tickets wanting to get into the masterclass.

1:33 So I have opened up a few more spots. Now, on Thursday, I'm going to raise the price to $147. Right now, it's only $97, so get your tickets before it's too late. This reminds me of that movie UHF with Weird Al Yankovic and the guy who played Kramer on Seinfeld. I think his name is Michael Richards. Michael Richards is like at this clock, and he's like, I know some of you guys like to wait until the last minute. Well, this is it. This is the last minute. It's really funny.

2:01 That dude is a genius actor, but this is it, boys. This is the last minute, and even if you can't attend, you will still get a recording of it, so don't delay. This is going to be the last NLP masterclass I ever do, so if you haven't stepped up and gotten your ticket yet, invest in yourself, and I have a 100% money-back guarantee. If you're not blown away by the content that I'm going to deliver to you, if you don't walk away feeling way more confident and ready to approach women on command, then I will buy the program back for you.

2:30 There's absolutely no risk. It's the first link in the description below. Get your ticket before it's too late. All right, guys, let's get into the content. So we had a big discussion about this on the coaching call the other night, and one of my boys, Noah, what is up, Noah, asked some really good questions around this, and I'm going to reveal to you what I told him when it comes to approaching women. Now, as I typically do, I'm going to save the best two for last, the ones that you've probably never heard before, and the ones that will probably kind of remap your thinking when it comes to this whole approaching thing.

3:04 So don't blow out my analytics the way you blew your load this morning with your Pornhub frequent masturbator platinum card, but stay on until the end. I guarantee you I am going to deliver the goods. All right, so a few basics first, boys. What do I always tell you the two most important things are when approaching a woman? That's right. You're a smart motherfucker. It's energy and tonality. Those are the two most important things. Energy, not meaning you being a spaz like one of those fucking blow-up dolls that stands outside the used car lot, but it instead means simply feeling good within yourself.

3:38 What I always tell my clients is this. Look at the girl, don't stare at her, but just glance at her and kind of feel where her energy is. Now, you may ask me, what do you mean feel what her energy is? Well, I believe that we as humans are more intuitive than what we give ourselves credit for. So what I want you to do is just kind of look at her and say, I feel like she's probably feeling about this good. And when I say this good, it's like, where's her vibe?

4:04 Where's her energy? Is she really up? Is she feeling great? Is she kind of down? Is she kind of in the middle, which honestly is where most girls are. But just look at her and say to yourself, all right, I think her energy is, let's say, a 7 out of 10. You need to be an 8 out of 10. Now, once again, energy does not mean that you are being a spaz, but it instead means simply feeling good within yourself. Women are external state seekers, meaning they want to feel better and they get their states from outside themselves.

4:34 This is why women like puppy dogs, ice cream, literatica and these bullshit shows on Netflix that you have to screen pass just to get to the stuff that you really want to watch. It's because externally women are given their state. So if you go up and you are in a lesser energy than she is, she's going to want to get rid of you. And this, by the way, is why many guys get blown out without even realizing it. They think they're going to fail. They're super fucking nervous.

4:58 They're not confident. They feel like they're taking something from the girl, which is a complete bullshit mentality to go in with. Therefore, their energy is lower than hers is. And she gets the ick from you, thus blowing you out. So the way to do it is to simply choose to feel better. And we can all do this right now. Just tell yourself, all right, I'm going to feel 15% better than I did just a second ago. Suddenly, you can feel better. You have control over your inner state, which, by the way, is one of the secrets of life.

5:29 Always control your inner state. Don't let outside circumstances get you emotional, get you into your feminine energy. Say, you know what? The situation sucks, but I'm going to man up and deal with it. I'm going to feel good, even though circumstances don't dictate me feeling good. Why? Because I'm internally motivated. I choose my state. So the goal is to feel just a little bit better than she does. And I have to reiterate, it doesn't mean you're spazzy. That's not the energy I'm talking about. It's just feeling good in your energy field.

5:58 When you approach, she's going to pick up on that. And this is one of the big secrets that makes my guys so successful when they approach women. I do NLP on them so they can access that state immediately, feeling good, and women want to be around people who feel good. They're gravitating towards it constantly. This is why people who you just feel good around, you feel good around. It's not necessarily because of their personality or the jokes they're saying. They just have a good energy. And that's what charisma is.

6:26 Charisma is leaving others feeling better from having met you. We want to have that charisma. So you just choose to feel a little bit better than she does, feel good, walk up. And I'm going to tell you the biggest, most important thing at the end. So stay tuned. Next thing is tonality. And I talk about this all the time, so I'm not going to go too far into it. But basically, you want your voice to go down at the end rather than up at the end.

6:51 Hey, what's your name is a bad example. Hey, what's your name is a good example. Just slightly goes down at the end. And if you have to, what I always tell my clients is, pretend you're talking to somebody who works for you, your little sister, or a girl that's completely into you. Sometimes I even say, imagine you just had sex with her. Are you going to supplicate to her, put her on a pedestal, and try to get something from her? A funny joke we always have in my coaching is, the most honest moment in a man's life is after he comes with a woman.

7:20 That's when he's completely honest. And for any women listening, if you want to ask him a question and get the truth, that's when you do it. Right after he blows his load, gets the baby batter off his brain, and comes on your back and then slaps a fucking sheet on it, and Superman's a hoe. Have you ever done that before? You come on a girl's back and then you slap a fucking sheet on there and you're like, you're Superman. I just Supermaned a hoe. If you haven't yet, I strongly suggest it.

7:44 It's pretty fucking funny. So we understand that tonality and energy are two big secrets. The next one, and rarely do people talk about this, is to have a little smile on your face when you first approach. Again, we want her feeling better from having met you, right? And when you see somebody smiling, you may not know this, but when you see somebody smiling, it actually releases serotonin in your brain. So when you see a person smiling, you naturally like that person more, even if you think you look weird while you're smiling, or yes, brother, even if your teeth aren't perfect.

8:17 You could smile with your lips closed, but have a little smile on your face. I call it a wry smile, W-R-Y, a wry smile, kind of like, hey, what's up? What's your name? If you're watching on video, you just saw me do it, but it's kind of, if I'm to explain it, a little bit of a half smile. It's not a shit-eating grin, like all your Christmases have come on the same day, which is what a lot of guys do, by the way. And that's another tip, don't get too excited.

8:42 But it's just a wry smile, like, hey, what's going on? What are you up to? And it's just that little bit of warmth that we need to have, because a woman is going to talk to you when she feels warmth from you. She feels trust from you. You're a cool guy. You're safe. Because remember, guys, women have a lot to risk, not only by having sex with guys, but also just interacting with a guy. What if he's a serial killer? What if he's a rapist? What if he's going to try to manipulate her in some way?

9:09 So you need to earn her trust quickly, and that comes from good energy, a little smile on your face. You approach. You always want to have downward tonality, which shows that you have authority, and also give her some space. A lot of guys I notice go right in there, and they close up with her personal space. Her comfort is one of your main priorities. So give her space. Sometimes I'll open, like, from 10 feet away, six feet away. Obviously, in nightclubs and loud places like that, it's a little bit different.

9:37 But especially in day game, I like to, like, lean on things, give her space, show that I'm comfortable. The more comfortable you are, the more comfortable she'll be. And I've already given you guys five, and I haven't even gotten through half of them that I want to share. Always over-delivering, as I'm going to do this coming Saturday on my NLP Masterclass. So don't be a fucking procrastinator, a foot-dragger, a guy in his feminine energy being like, oh, I don't know what to do. Should I trust him?

10:03 Bro, I have a money-back guarantee. Get your fucking ticket, you sea donkey. This is the last time I'm ever going to do an NLP Masterclass. All right, boys. So when it comes to being relaxed, this works into being less reactive than the girl. The person who's reacting more is the one who's not controlling the situation. So you want to be calm, cool, collected. I'm actually going to slap up a video of me talking to a girl at the gym. I know 50% of you guys listen on audio only.

10:32 So I'm going to verbally explain what's happening when I'm talking to this girl. Okay, I'm very relaxed. My body is straight up. My head is straight up. You can see I'm smiling sometimes, but not all the time. I'm less reactive than she is. Look at the way she's reacting. She's smiling a lot. She's more interactive. She's more reactive, which is what we want. We want her putting in more energy. The person who puts in more energy as far as like movements and laughing and like really getting into the conversation is the one who's controlling the conversation.

11:04 But I can guarantee you in my body, in my heart, I'm feeling better than she is. And that's why you can tell she's kind of stoked to talk to me. She's into the conversation, but I'm very relaxed. I'm leaning on a machine. I have my arm extended and leaning on the machine, completely comfortable. I'm willing to wipe my face. I don't know if you guys saw that. I had an itch, so I itched it. And it's not apologetically, right? It's not like I'm trying to change my body language.

11:31 I'm very comfortable. It looks like I'm just talking to my best friend. And that's the vibe that you want. Relaxed body language. You don't care about what happens. Now that gets me into the most important point. On the coaching call, Noah, what's up, Noah? Asked me, well, what do I do when it's like a really important open, right? Like the girl's hot. I want to get her phone number. What do I do then? And I said to him, brother, there are no important opens. Every single open is meaningless.

12:00 You don't give a shit about it. You don't know her from Adam. So why are you giving her so much credit? Why do you want her phone number? Why are you saying, how do I get that girl? This is the important one. It's not. You don't know if she has a good personality. You don't know if her breath smells like a fucking dead fish that got shit on by a sumo wrestler. You don't know if she launches ping pong balls out of her vagina as a side job on the weekends.

12:23 You don't know her from anything. So why are you giving her so much credit? Every single open doesn't matter. And that's the biggest point of this entire episode. You need to be completely and utterly outcome independent. I don't fucking care. Why? Because there's plenty, billions of different girls that you can open. So if you've built her up in her head, oh, she has the perfect eyes, the perfect tits. Her hair is exactly as I like it. Her eyes are so angelic and her face is so hot.

12:50 That's the girl I want. You're gonna fucking blow it. The way to go in is to not care. The less you care, the less you try, the less you have an outcome in your mind that you hope will manifest, the better it's gonna go for you. If you go up to a girl thinking, I wanna get her phone number, you've already blown yourself out. Every single open is meaningless. There's no meaning behind it. You don't care what happens. If you miss this bus, you'll just take the next one.

13:15 So how do you know then what to do? If you don't care, then how do you do well in the conversation? Well, that's the balance, guys. And seducing a woman is not easy. This is why I've had over 740 episodes or whatever the fuck it is at this point, because it's very balanced. It's very nebulous. It's not just black or white. Yeah, I don't care, but I'm still gonna go in there and entertain and most importantly, be entertained. You are interested not in her. You're interested in the conversation or more accurately, seeing if she's interesting, seeing if you vibe.

13:48 If you had your choice of any girl you wanted, this is the way you would screen girls. You would say, yeah, she's hot. Of course, I wanna have sex with her just based on her body. Men are very visual and we have to honor that. But at the same time, I don't know her. So I'm gonna go screen her. What's her voice like? I talked to this girl this weekend. She was so hot, dude, this smoking hot blonde. And it sounded like she smoked 12 cigarettes a day and just slammed vodka all day.

14:14 She's like, hey, how are you? And I was like, the fuck? Who hijacked your voice box and replaced it with the goddamn frog? Because this is weird. And I was like, dude, I'm not attracted to this girl anymore. Even though on paper, she looked great. So every single approach is completely meaningless. You don't care. And as far as you're concerned, you're going up and you're saying one thing. You're saying one thing. Hey, for example, where are the watermelons in this place? And she's like, oh, they're over here and over here.

14:40 She has a cute voice. She's got a good little energy. And you're like, all right. I'll throw another question out there. Oh yeah, I see you have a watermelon there. How do you choose watermelons? I've never really known how to do that. She explains it. She's sweet. She's kind. You're kind of jiving with her. And you'd be like, oh, I noticed you have this and this in your car. What are you making tonight? What are you making us? Right? Now you're starting to get into the conversation more based on whether or not she makes the cut.

15:05 So every approach doesn't matter. Every approach is meaningless. Every approach is just you approaching to see if there's a good conversation there. If you were playing like pickup basketball and you saw some guy who you felt like you wanted to be friends with because he's wearing a shirt of the same band that you like and you go up to him and he's just weird and he has a weird energy, are you going to like try to get his phone number? No, you're going to see if you guys jive.

15:32 And that's what you need to do with women. You're just seeing if you jive. It doesn't matter what happens. Even if she flat out rejects you, who cares? There's more girls to talk to. And I guarantee you, you open 10 girls, you're going to jive with a couple of them. You need to screen for that real connection, not screen for trying to get her phone number just because she's attractive. I don't want any girl's phone number until she proves herself to me. And I'll tell you boys, some of the most beautiful, angelic, model level fucking hottest girls that you're masturbating to have been the most horrible people I've ever met.

16:08 Really horrible people. Like straight up stab you in the back, fucking lie to you. Just horrible souls. Why do you want her phone number? You want that fucking dumpster fire in your life? You want to invite Hurricane Ashley to just tear a hole in your butthole so big that even she could fuck it? Of course not. You screen them and you eliminate them and it's all up to you. You, brother, are the prize. So let's go over them, boys. Obviously, when you go up, you want to have a good energy.

16:35 Just feel better than she does. You want to have a slight smirk on your face, what I like to call a wry smile. You want to have your tonality go down rather than up. You are the authority. And if you need more help with this, I suggest you listen to my episode, Why You Should Talk to Every Single Girl Like She's a Peasant. One of my most highly downloaded episodes, unfortunately, because it's a little negative, but that's clickbait. You know I'm always positive, boys. You know I always put the love out there.

17:01 But the reason I say that is because some of you guys are so fucking nice. I need to get you into the, you're the king, she's the fucking shit-crusted peasant whose job is to clean the buttholes of goats before slaughter, and then I get you right in the middle where you should be. With authority but still cool, right? Like a cool boss that you had who tells you what to do, who isn't afraid to let you know that you've done some things wrong, but at the same time, you trust the guy and you feel good around him.

17:26 That's the vibe. All right, so good energy, smile on your face, downward tonality, relaxed body language. You're talking to her just like you're talking to your best friend. You don't care what happens and that's the most important one. Every single approach is meaningless. It does not matter. She gets one question from you based on her answer, she might earn herself a second one. Based on that, she might earn herself a third one. You are less reactive than she is because you don't care what happens. Guys, you go in there and like try to entertain and try to be charismatic and try to like run all these gambits, which I do give you, get blown out because they're trying too hard.

18:04 And once again, it's that balance. Yeah, we're going to try, but we're not going to really try to get any result. We're trying to have a good time. That's what we're trying to do. And if I need to run some gambits and impress her with some stories and really butter her up, just like you buttered up your penile instrument this morning with your Pornhub Frequent Master Beta Platinum card, I'm going to do that. But ultimately, I don't care what happens. I'm having a good time. I'm going to talk to somebody and it's you right now.

18:32 Yeah, because you're cute. I'll give you credit. You got one hash mark off of 10 different hash marks. You got one. But let's see what you got. Are you fun? I'm going to tell you some stories. See if you could tell me some stories. Are we vibing? Is there a vibe there? If it's not, I don't give a fuck. I'll meet another girl and you move on from it. So you have to train yourself to not fucking care. And how do you do that? I will remap that inside your brain to make you feel like the prize.

18:57 That's how you do it. You have to feel that you're the fucking prize. You're the champion. You have to fall in love with yourself, brother. And I'm going to help you do that on this Saturday's NLP Masterclass. If you're seriously so cheap that you won't invest $97 into yourself, I don't know what to tell you. I had a brilliant mentor tell me once, until you're making $200,000 a year, you should invest every single penny into yourself because you are the mechanism that's going to dictate your future success.

19:24 And we have had such unprecedented success with NLP. I want to show you what it can do. Yeah, so that you'll sign up for my three-month coaching program. The $97, the NLP Masterclass, it's such an over-deliverance based on how much I'm charging. Just going to be honest with you, man. I want to do it to you so you can see the magic of it so that you eventually come join us in the program. That's how much I know this shit works. And you can hear it from my voice.

19:50 You can see it in my body language if you're watching on video. I know this shit works. And I want to prove it to you too. So sign up today. Don't delay. Don't wait until the last minute because the price is going to go up. And I will see you the weekend of April 25th this coming weekend. All right, gentlemen. I super appreciate you listening. Listen up. I have an awesome one. An awesome one coming up on Tuesday. I'm also going to drop something new that I know you guys are going to love.

20:14 It's funny as fuck and it's really well done. So come again on Tuesday and I will see you in the next episode.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.