5 Brilliant Reasons Why You Should ARGUE WITH WOMEN!

0:00 Everything a woman is attracted to when it comes to men is based on his ability to survive, and that includes having a strong frame, being imperturbable, being inside your own reality, having your own belief systems and standing behind them unapologetically, and being the dude who can lead her to where she wants to be led. Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, gentlemen? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP.

0:40 I really do appreciate you, and today we are going to talk about why you should argue and debate with women. This comes from the all-important concept of frame control. If you don't know what frame control is, I'm going to lay it down for you today, and then we're going to get into why you should use frame control to basically be disagreeable, both with women as well as with people in your life. Now, there's a lot of subtleties to this, so I want you to concentrate. I want you to really stay with me because this can be misunderstood and miscalibrated very easily.

1:15 You can go into interactions with the wrong kind of vibe and essentially piss off women, make yourself look like an asshole, rather than making yourself look like an attractive man, which, of course, is always the point. So stay with me until the very end. I'm going to lay out a lot of really interesting points in this one, and we got a lot to get through, so let's go ahead and jump into it. So frame control, if you don't know what that is, after this episode, I strongly suggest you listen to any and all of my episodes regarding frame control because it's the single most important element of seduction.

1:48 In fact, if she realizes that she has a stronger frame than you do, she will fail to get attracted to you. Frame control means you leading the conversation, you having a strong belief in your own reality, and you being willing to disagree with her if she says some stuff or does some stuff that you essentially disagree with. Now, one of the tenets of frame control is that you're on your interstate of centeredness. Interstate of centeredness means that you're unaffected by the outside circumstances of your life.

2:22 For example, let's say you're driving with a girl and a cop pulls you over and you get a ticket. After you get the ticket, you pull out and you start complaining, you start whining, you start showing that that situation got into your reality. It shows that you have a weak frame. It shows that you're easily thrown to and fro by the outside circumstances of your life, and that is essentially unattractive. If, on the other hand, you drive away and you're like, hey, these things happen, no big deal, let's go have a good time, and you show her that you're unaffected, that shows a strong frame.

2:55 A strong frame is, once again, unaffected by outside circumstances. This is going to play a really important role in what we're going to discuss today regarding why you should debate with women, so hold on to that one. You are unaffected. What she says cannot get you off your inner balance point, your interstate of centeredness, because you have a strong reality. You are seated in who you are as a man. You understand that shit happens in life. It's not going to get me off my inner balance point.

3:24 I'm going to stay completely centered. I don't get too excited about successes. I don't get too bummed out about losses. These things happen. This too shall pass. I'm at peace. And that's what frame control essentially is. It's a peacefulness within you, but at the same time, if somebody tries to fuck with you, push your boundaries, you will show them that you are not to be fucked with. So this concept of having a strong frame within you essentially shows her that you have this all-important thing called survivability.

3:55 Now, I know I'm throwing a lot of things that you hear. Once again, stay with me. This is really important stuff. Survivability means your ability to survive and, yes, even thrive in today's society. So going back to that police example where you got pulled over, do you think a guy who complains, whines, and basically acts like a victim because he got a ticket from a police officer is showing strong survivability? Obviously not. He's showing that the outside circumstances of his life can push him around. Therefore, he has a weak sense of reality, a weak sense of survivability.

4:31 He's not going to be able to survive effectively in today's society because he's pushed so easily off once again that inner balance point. If, on the other hand, you are imperturbable, you have that inner peace within yourself, that shows good survivability and that shows that no matter what happens to this guy, he's going to be able to handle it. Now, the reason women's attraction for you is based on your survivability is because she's subconsciously looking for genes for you to pass on to her children. So if you have a strong survivability, it means that her children are going to have a stronger survivability and thus have a better chance of surviving.

5:12 The most interesting thing about attraction is that it's always based on the children. You're attracted to her for health signs. How hot is she? How sexy is she? Did you know that that's basically her ability to have a healthy baby? That's all it's based on. Why are we attracted to nice tits? Because nice tits hold milk and they'll be able to feed that baby milk to give it a better chance of survival. Why are we attracted to plump, firm, nice asses? It's because, and this is really interesting, the fat within the butt, and I literally just learned this, has something within it, a chemical within it that basically helps the development of the brain of the fetus.

5:52 So you're attracted to big fat asses where you hit the right butt cheek and a wave goes across, slaps off the left butt cheek, and then you grab your surfboard and ride that thing back to the right butt cheek simply because it's going to give that baby the better chance of having a healthy brain. Isn't that insane? Everything you're attracted to, to a woman, is based off health signs to have a healthy baby. Everything a woman is attracted to when it comes to men is based on his ability to survive.

6:20 And that includes having a strong frame, being imperturbable, being inside your own reality, having your own belief systems and standing behind them unapologetically, and being the dude who can lead her to where she wants to be led. Now we get into why you should debate and argue with women. So first and foremost, argue isn't really the right word. I'm going to admit to you, I kind of put it in there as clickbait because it makes it a little more controversial, a little more interesting, and I wanted you guys to click in.

6:50 But argue isn't exactly right. I mean, we could say argue, but really it's debate. It's being disagreeable. Arguing, in my opinion, implies negativity. And as I just said, a man who's on his inner state of centeredness isn't negative. He's imperturbable, right? He's at peace. So even if somebody quote unquote pisses him off, he's always very calm. He's within that state of masculinity. Do you think masculinity gets butthurt, gets triggered, gets angry, and starts crying like a little bitch? Of course not. Masculinity is always on its inner balance point, always like, hey, I'll deal with this.

7:26 Solution oriented. You can't get into my frame, bro. You can't even affect me. That's essentially what frame control is. So arguing isn't really right. Debating, on the other hand, is absolutely right. So when a woman says something to you that you disagree with, I can guarantee you at least 80% of you guys will completely avoid at all costs debating with this girl. The reason you do that is because you don't want to break rapport. You don't want to make her mad at you. You don't want to put a negative quote unquote vibe into the interaction.

8:00 At first blush, this is a smart thing to do because you want to keep the interaction positive. You want to keep her having good feelings. So logically, you think, nah, I don't want to disagree with her on the fact that she thinks baseball is stupid and I think baseball is a great fucking game. Even though she just said, oh my God, baseball is so stupid, I'm not going to disagree with her on that point because I don't want to put negative energy into this interaction. Logically, you think that's a good idea.

8:26 But I'm here to tell you as a dating coach, you should disagree with her. Why? Because a dude who's disagreeable, who shows up and supports his own belief systems, has more survivability. Think about the most successful people you know. Do you think they avoid confrontation? Of course not. Do you think they're afraid to negotiate? Of course not. Do you think they're afraid to ask for favors, ask for concessions, ask for things, and request that they get a better deal in any situation? Of course not. The most successful people you know are disagreeable, but listen to this.

9:02 They're not disagreeable in an asshole kind of way. They're disagreeable in a cool kind of way, in a way that shows their calm on their interstate of centeredness and, yes, at peace. Me, for example, I'm disagreeable sometimes, and I'm not afraid to tell you guys when you email me, say, for example, you apply to my program and don't answer one of my questions, I'm going to tell you, hey, bro, we need to have this answered before we can move to the next step. Could you please do that?

9:27 Thank you. I appreciate it. Instead of groveling and being like, hey, man, like I know number six was hard to answer, but I'm really going to need that in order to create your NLP intake form. Fuck no. And on that point, if guys don't show up to coaching calls, if they're not doing their approaches, if they're not doing their NLP, which, by the way, I watch very closely when you're my client, I watch you like a hawk. I'm going to tell you about it. And I'm going to say, hey, bro, you're slipping.

9:54 You're letting this opportunity go away. Get back on track. And what happens? They get back on track and they get success. So you as that alpha, that unapologetic man, that dude who's attractive, you cannot be afraid to debate with women. Now, a few caveats on this. First of all, as I keep saying, you have to be imperturbable. If you let any negativity whatsoever come into that interaction, she's going to walk away. You're going to lose attraction. Why? Once again, a dude who lets negativity come in shows that his frame is being affected.

10:28 He's getting off that interstate of centeredness and she's getting to him. She's affecting his frame, which communicates he has a weak frame, a weak sense of reality. So you cannot, under any circumstance, get butt hurt, get negative, have some like aggression behind your argument. No, no, no, no. You have to stay completely calm, centered, deliver your argument very logically, very emotionless, or better yet, delivering it with humor, with a light heart, with a smile on your face. So, for example, she's like, oh, my God, the Dodgers suck.

11:03 I hate those guys so much. They're going to beat the Yankees in the World Series. Now, I'm recording this on Tuesday afternoon, and game four is on Tuesday evening, so I don't know who's going to win, but it's pretty likely the Dodgers are going to win based off them winning the first three games. So we're going to go with this example. She's like, I hate the Dodgers. They fucking suck. The Yankees are so much better. Instead of being like, dude, what are you talking about? Like, the Dodgers won the first three games.

11:27 They're so much better. You laugh, and you're like, oh, I see you're a little upset because the Dodgers are just spanking those Yankees. They're just kicking their ass, huh? Otani, best player ever. Thank God we have them on our team. So what you're doing is you're showing, hey, I disagree with you. I'm going to bust your chops a little bit. I'm going to be lighthearted. I'm going to smile, and I'm going to bring it to you, disagreeing with what you just said. And this is really good to do, gentlemen, with women who have an opinion about something that's really subjective.

11:59 And when I say subjective, it means do you like this kind of music? Do you like this kind of TV show? What do you think of this politician? What do you think of this baseball team, this football team, this college, this country, this kind of lifestyle, this kind of diet? If it's really subjective and just kind of opinion-based, those are the best times to disagree with her, to show her, hey, I disagree with what you're saying. Many times I'll be in conversations with girls, and they'll throw out some negativity.

12:27 They'll be like, oh, my mom's a bitch. My boss is an asshole. I hate this club. That girl over there is so ugly. They'll throw negativity out, and this happens all the time, usually with younger women, because let's be honest, younger women really haven't evolved in their consciousness. So they're still stuck in ego. They're still stuck in negativity. They throw out some negative shit. They complain. They whine. They play victim, and I disagree with them. Immediately, I put the kibosh on that shit. I question it.

12:54 I say, why did you just say that? And she's like, what? I'll be like, why did you just call that chick fat? Like, why would you say that? And she's like, well, look at her, you know, plus she's a bitch. And I'll be like, you do understand that when you insult somebody like that, it's actually kind of communicating to me that you feel insecure about something within yourself. You do understand that, right? Now, don't get mad. Don't get mad. I'm just having a discussion. I'm just kind of pointing it out to you.

13:19 Do you see how that possibly is, that what you attack in another, you actually kind of hate in yourself? So look at that with honesty, right? What is it that you hate about yourself? And then you realize that, and you can take steps to improve it. So, gentlemen, that's an example of me disagreeing with her being negative about some other girl, pointing out to her the truth, which is when you attack another. And by the way, boys, this also happens if you attack me. I know everything I need to know about you.

13:46 If you send me hate mail or try to be an asshole on my Instagram, it shows me everything I need to know because it shows me what you feel about yourself. So I'll point that out to girls arguing with them, quote-unquote, more like debating with them about how they're living their life. And then I'll mentor them. Mentoring is a concept I teach in my coaching where you take the girl under your wing and show her a better way to live because that's why we're all here.

14:12 We all know it. We're all trying to develop. That's why you're listening to this podcast. You're trying to get to the next best version of yourself. So when you help a woman do that, she's going to get more attracted to you. It shows you have a strong frame. It shows you have a strong sense of reality. You believe in yourself. It shows that you're not afraid to be disagreeable. It shows that you're unaffected, and it shows that your way of living, she can actually benefit from.

14:37 Furthermore, gentlemen, it shows you're not afraid for the conversation to go bad, which is so extremely attractive. If you show a girl, I don't care what you think. I'm willing for this to go bad. I'm willing to essentially piss you off because I'm so seated in who I am, so seated in my reality, and I have so many girls that I'm already seeing. I don't care if this goes bad. So you being negative against that girl over there, I'm going to call you out, and I'm going to do it in a calm way.

15:04 I'm even going to bust your chops a little bit. Then I'm going to lead that into mentoring you, showing you a better way to live. And as I alluded to earlier, gentlemen, you should also do this with opinion-based stuff. She's wearing a, I don't know, Notre Dame sweatshirt, and you're a, I don't know, Purdue fan. Okay, I'm just pulling examples out of my ass. You would be wise to say, you know what, you're fun to talk to, but I seriously cannot believe that you are wearing a Notre Dame sweatshirt right now.

15:32 Are you serious? And she's like, why do you like hate Notre Dame and be like, Purdue? Purdue is so much better than Notre Dame. They won this game. They won that game. Their quarterback's better. Their wide receiver, Deontay Von Deontay, so much better than anything Notre Dame has. And you're kind of doing it with a smile, you're kind of busting your chops, and you're showing her that you're willing to be disagreeable. So attractive. And this, again, is most readily used with things that are opinion-based or behavior-based.

16:04 Like if she's complaining about her mom, I'll call that shit out. She's complaining about her boss, I'll let her know about the law of attraction, how what she focused on expands. And always in a way where I'm not getting emotional. Now, I always avoid politics, religion, anything that can really go down the sinkhole of argument, because people are really ensconced in those kinds of belief systems. I meet a lot of Christian chicks. This is the United States. 60% of Americans are Christian. I'm not. I believe in probably 90% of what they preach, but I believe that Jesus was essentially an enlightened master.

16:39 And his teachings have been slightly misinterpreted, but the majority of it I agree with. Now, she brings up, oh, my God, that girl's going to hell. I'm not going to be like, yo, hell doesn't exist. That's completely wrong, dude. Do you seriously believe that still? Oh, my God, what an idiot. I'm not going to do that. I'm just going to let it go. I'm not arguing with that right now. But I will argue with her doing something like keying a guy's car when we're on a date.

17:02 Oh, one time I was on a date with a girl, and she saw a Lamborghini, and she fucking like hit the Lamborghini. And at that point, I said, dude, why did you do that? Why would you have done that? This guy probably worked really hard for this. You don't know his situation. He could have saved up for five years for that thing. Why did you do that? She's like, oh, I hate rich people. That kind of shit I will argue with. But it's always the right place, the right time, being at peace, disagreeing with women.

17:28 On top of this gentleman, asking girls why questions. Why did you order that drink? Why did you just say that? Why are you wearing that shirt? Why did you just go out like that? Why did you show up to this club where it's literally 14 degrees outside in a miniskirt and a crop top? What are you thinking, Kelly? Are you fucking crazy? Are you like one of those polar bears that goes and jumps in the lake with all your friends on a freezing February morning? And she's like, nah, I just like to look cute.

17:57 What I've done is show her I'm willing to break rapport. I need to be explained to because my frame is so strong. You need to show me why you're doing what you're doing because I just don't get it. This shows, once again, you have a strong frame, a strong sense of reality, a strong inner balance point. You are at inner peace. You're okay for the situation to go bad, and you're not to be fucked with. You're not the guy who's just to go along, letting her frame lead, and buying into her frame as so many guys do.

18:27 Guys will be like, so, like, what's your favorite soccer team? And she's like, oh, I like Inter Miami because they have Messi and Suarez. And he's like, yeah, me too. What's your favorite drink? Oh, I like pina coladas. Yeah, yeah, yeah, they're really good. I like them too. Instead, you'd be wise to be like, pina colada? What the hell are you talking about? You're so into Miami, dude. You like Inter Miami, pina coladas with rum in them? No, no, no, no. The best drink by far is Bailey's and coffee.

18:53 And I don't drink, gentlemen. I'm just throwing shit out there. Being disagreeable in a way that's playful, arguing with her in a way that doesn't have any negativity, just expressing your point, will, almost every single time, get them more attracted to you. Now, my final thought is this. What if she gets butthurt? What if she gets all offended and she can't fucking handle it? Well, first of all, you and I both know she has a weak frame. But fortunately for women, they don't have to have strong frames.

19:21 That's okay. I can accept that. But chicks will get butthurt sometimes. So what I always say is this. I say, hey, listen, I didn't realize me joking with you in that way would make you upset. So I'll go ahead and avoid those kinds of jokes moving forward, okay? And she's going to be like, okay. No, it's boys. I didn't say sorry. Hey, sorry. I offended you because I said pina coladas are stupid. No. It's like, hey, I didn't realize that kind of joke would offend you.

19:45 I'll avoid it moving forward to accommodate for you being offended. All right? Sound good? And she's like, sound good? Boom. You carry on with the conversation. I'm telling you boys, when you're ensconced in your frame and willing to be disagreeable with a girl, willing to debate her on certain belief systems and mostly opinions, it builds so much attraction. It is the foundation of frame control. It's the foundation of showing survivability. So go out there and be disagreeable. Once again, without being too negative, without getting butthurt and without offending her.

20:18 And if you do, then you explain it away by saying, hey, I didn't realize you would be affected. Notice the language here. You would get affected by that. So I'll go ahead and change my language moving forward to accommodate for your butthurt feelings, you stupid ass biatch. Never say that, obviously, but kind of in your head, you're like, really, bro? You're getting triggered by that? And that's why, gentlemen, when people get triggered, I automatically know they have a weak sense of reality. Anything anybody says that offends you shows weakness if it offends you.

20:51 So have a stronger frame. Be imperturbable. You can't say anything to me I haven't heard already or that would affect me because I'm masculine. I'm internally validated. And you need to be that way too. Be disagreeable with women and see them get more attracted to you. Gentlemen, I appreciate you listening. I have a spectacular one coming up on Monday. So please stay tuned for that one. And I will see you in the next episode. So. Bye. Bye.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.