3 Secrets to EPIC Storytelling | Why You MUST Tell Stories to Get Women Attracted to You!

0:00 Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. So I saw a dead body during my trip to Roatan, Honduras. A lot of you guys know, especially those who listened to my previous episode, I was stuck in Honduras because I got a really bad ear infection. Roatan is a little island off of Honduras and it's really beautiful, man. It's like Hawaii on steroids. And Marissa's uncle has a big house down there.

0:33 So we went to visit. I was swimming in the swimming pool with my daughter, Lucia, got an ear infection, got stuck there for an extra week and just got home last night. And while the infection is gone, I still can't hear out of the damn thing. And if any of you have ever had an ear infection, it's freaking weird not being able to hear out of your ear. It's like I can hear myself talking and hear an echo in my ear. During the trip, since Marissa's uncle George didn't expect for me to stay an extra week, the extra car that he had got lent to somebody else and I had to find transportation for myself.

1:03 So me being the smart motherfucker that I am, I decided to rent a motorcycle. Now, if you guys have ever been to a third world country, I'm sure they're all like this. There are absolutely no rules to the road and the streets are as ghetto as can be. They're doing construction all the time. People are passing each other. It's just a freaking madhouse. But me being the complete idiot, the complete sea donkey that I am, decided to go ahead and rent a motorcycle because I've been riding motorcycles my whole life.

1:30 So what can an island do to me? So I'm riding this motorcycle around and I come up on this little traffic jam. So traffic jams are obviously common. There's always traffic going on, especially in a third world country. And as I get closer to the scene of the accident, I see this big humongous mad truck on the other side of the road that stopped. And curiously, I'm looking at the thing and I look underneath it and it looked like the engine dropped out of it because there was seemingly an engine underneath it.

1:56 Well, as I look closer, it was actually a motorcycle. A motorcycle was pinned underneath this mad truck. And I'm looking at this whole scene and I look a little bit to the left and there's a fucking dead body sitting right there. Probably about a 17-year-old boy, his head completely crushed open, blood everywhere. I don't know about you, brother, but I've never seen a dead body before. I've seen him at funerals. I've seen it definitely on TV. I've seen videos, but never live and in person. Here I am on a motorcycle and I haven't ridden motorcycles on the street in several years.

2:29 And there's a freaking dead body of a kid who just got killed by a motorcycle. So as I'm riding past, that wave of fear kind of comes over me where I'm like, dude, this place is hella dangerous. People are goddamn psychotic here. There are no rules. People are just going hog wire, balls to the wall. And what happened is this kid tried to pass traffic through a curve and he ran into oncoming traffic, got sucked underneath that big rig and died. And apparently, according to a news story, another person died too.

2:59 I just didn't see her. He had a girl on the back, both of them dead, ran over by this mad truck. So as I'm riding off, I'm like, yep, I'm returning this thing right now. I actually had it rented until the next day, but I decided to return it because I just got a bad feeling. And I was like, yo, I have no business riding a motorcycle on this island when I don't know what I'm doing. Apparently, if you're a gringo, like I obviously am, and you get in an accident, they try to come after you for all your money.

3:25 It just wasn't worth it. So I returned the motorcycle. That was two days ago, took taxis for the rest of the trip, flew home yesterday. But man, as I've said, I've never seen a dead body before. And it really shook me up. It really made me consider how fleeting life is, how quickly it can end, and also just how dangerous traffic is. Now, in the case of this kid, it was probably his fault because the truck was literally in its own lane and the motorcycle was sucked underneath it.

3:51 So like I said, I think he was passing traffic through a curve, couldn't see the blind area, and just ran straight into this mad truck, which was clearly his fault. But you guys know from having driven motorcycles for some of you, but probably all of you driving cars, it's the other idiot that you have to watch out for. It's not you. I'm only assuming that you're a good driver because people who listen to podcasts are usually more intelligent. They have their life more together. So I'm assuming you're a good driver, but it's the other people on the road.

4:21 And that's especially true for motorcyclists. And by the way, if you do drive a car, please look out for motorcyclists because they obviously are taking a huge risk by riding the motorcycle. And it's oftentimes when they don't see the motorcyclists that they get crashed into. My biggest fear whenever I was riding motorcycles was getting turned in front of, such as you're going down a road and somebody has a free lane to kind of turn in front of you or pull out in front of you, that was always the most sketchy shit for me.

4:47 And that's oftentimes how motorcycles get hit. So as you listen to this story, I'm sure you're thinking back of some accidents you've seen, of some stories you've heard, or even friends or family that you've lost due to car accidents or motorcycle accidents. And I want to tell you that you are responsible for your own safety. So always check three times because again, it's always the other idiot that's going to cause your accident. It's kind of like turning left at a traffic light. If you're the first car and the light turns green to turn left, brother, always look left and always look right because people running red lights is a huge reason there are so many fatalities with cars is because the other idiot isn't paying attention.

5:28 So you as an unapologetic man who's trying to improve himself need to take the next step to defend against other people's stupidity. So that's my story, boys. And in that story were the three secrets of epic storytelling. And we're going to go over that today. After I go over that, I'm going to give you two bonuses that pertain to women specifically when telling stories to get them more attracted to you. Needless to say, if you've been listening to my podcast for any amount of time, storytelling is one of the top five ways to get a woman attracted to you and to give yourself more substance to speak about in the first conversation, the first date, second date and beyond.

6:05 Also, it allows her to see those high quality things about yourself without you actually bragging. So in this episode, I'm going to talk about A of all the three steps to epic storytelling, B of all the two bonuses that pertain to women specifically. And then I want to leave you with some ideas about how you can create stories to tell to women to get them more attracted to you. The first secret of an effective story is to start it with a provocative statement. The very first thing I said in this episode was, I saw a dead body on Roatan Honduras.

6:39 That shit is provocative. So whenever you start a story, you want to almost start with the punchline. It's almost like making a title for a podcast. I sit there and think about the absolute most clickable title possible because if you just put some BS like episode 536 and nothing else, no one's going to click on it. It's the same thing with women. It's the same thing with people in general. You have to keep their attention because people have, especially in today's age, very short attention spans. They're on Instagram.

7:07 They're on social media networks. They're on things like TikTok that placate to their short attention span and actually exacerbate it and make it worse. So in order to keep a woman's attention, you need to have a bold statement right in the beginning. For example, when I tell women about my experience of having panic attacks and agoraphobia, which seems negative, and I'm actually going to talk about that at the end of the show, seems negative. What I actually do is I make it into a provocative statement that eventually turns into a positive.

7:32 So I'll say in the beginning, I'll be like, yeah, when I lived in Japan, I married 200 couples and I had a panic attack during every single marriage ceremony. So that's the first statement I say oftentimes to get women involved and invested and want to learn more. It's like a teaser trailer. And you guys have to think this way when thinking about social dynamics. You have to keep people interested, build the intrigue. If you're going off on boring details for any amount of time whatsoever, you are going to lose their attention.

8:05 Only include what is absolutely necessary, such as I did talking about how the reason I got a motorcycle in the first place was because I got an ear infection. I got my car taken away and it was my only option for a mode of transportation. So there are certain facts that you need to include, but man, if it's not provocative, if it's not super important to the story and the listener will get lost unless you say it, leave that shit out. So the first statement should be something like, I almost died.

8:30 This is why I hate XYZ thing. I was done. Okay. These kinds of provocative statements lock in the person's attention and keep them in the story for the duration of the story so that you can embed all those high value traits and get her more attracted to you. The second tip is, is to make it a me versus them or good versus evil kind of dynamic. The reason this works is because human psychology has evolved where oftentimes we learn through stories and it's always the good guys versus the bad guys.

9:04 In almost every single successful story, particularly in Hollywood and books and other forms of media, there's always a good guy and a bad guy. And there's always a theme of us versus them. How did I include that in my Roatan story? I talked about how you are a good driver and you have to look out for the other idiots. It's the people who don't pay attention to motorcyclists, people who run red lights that are a danger to you and I, but you and I are in an alliance.

9:32 We're the good guys. Those other people are the bad guys. And that builds rapport with people when telling the story. So by me throwing in that good versus evil element, you actually build rapport with me because you're on my team. It's you and me against everybody else. And as the old saying goes, the enemy of my enemy is my friend. So that's the second tip. Make a good versus evil dynamic. The third secret is, alluding to what I just said, make the listener the hero of the story.

10:01 Now, this is oftentimes difficult to do when you're telling a story about how you rallied through some adversity to become what you are today. And I'm going to explain how to do that. But if you can tie it into that person and relate your story to their story about either how driving is dangerous and how I'm sure you've seen accidents or you've lost people in the past or somebody you know was killed in a motorcycle accident or talking about how they also struggle against the same thing, such as if you're a motorcyclist, you totally relate to what I'm saying, how none of these idiots see you and you always feel like you're going to get launched into outer space because people aren't paying attention.

10:36 This is how to build rapport with the listener. So making them the hero of the story is the third secret, always tying it back into them. Let's go over the three secrets. First one is provocative statement right in the beginning. Second one is us versus them theme. And the third one is they are the hero of the story. Now we're going to go into the two bonuses. The next one is particularly when speaking to women, you must embed high value traits into your story to show that you're a champion, you're an alpha male, you are attractive.

11:12 This is the reason that storytelling is so effective when attracting women is because you're able to embed those high value traits into your stories, almost like putting medicine into a dog biscuit and feeding it to the dog. If you hide those high value things within it and give it to her, she's subconsciously determining that you are a high value guy and that you are attractive. So for example, me and the Roatan story. The first thing is I travel. I go to cool places. I was just in the Caribbean having a great time with my family.

11:41 That's high value. Second thing is I ride motorcycles. I know how to ride motorcycles. And while they may be dangerous, they are sexy as hell. The third thing is, is that I had compassion for that kid who just died. 17 years old, he got killed. All the moments that that kid threw away because of his overzealous and aggressive motorcycle riding. It's such a tragedy. And think about his mom too and his dad. God, it's so horrible. I couldn't even believe it. I've never seen a dead body before.

12:06 It really made me reflect. So by saying that, it shows that I'm reflecting on life. I'm being humbled. I'm thinking about what's beyond it. And that too is attractive. Next thing is I recognize when I make a mistake. I was an idiot for renting a motorcycle on freaking Honduras, Roatan Island, a third world country with no rules, bad decision. And I admit that. And I returned the motorcycle and was humble enough to admit that to continue on with my vacation. And she's seeing all those high value things embedded again, like medicine embedded into a dog biscuit, fed to her, and she gets attracted to you because of it.

12:41 So the fifth tip, and this is so freaking important, is that you have to communicate that you overcame adversity in all of your stories, no matter if it's a tiny adversity or a big one, such as my panic attacks in Japan. A lot of you guys know that I've had problems with panic attacks, anxiety, agoraphobia, stress. It's always been something that's not only in my family, but definitely within me. And it reared its ugly head when I was doing wedding ceremonies in Japan, kind of a whole long story of itself, which I will tell to women to show that I overcame that and I became a better man because of it.

13:20 Not only does it show that I overcame my anxiety, but it shows I lived in Japan. I speak Japanese. I've married 200 couples. Hmm, that's really interesting. And yes, I had agoraphobia and panic attacks, but I overcame it to where now I am an NLP coach. I get on stage in front of thousands of people sometimes, and I talk to hundreds of thousands, and yes, sometimes even millions on this podcast without any fear whatsoever. Look at all those high value traits that were communicated in a seemingly self-deprecating story, a story that doesn't make me look good.

13:48 Whatever you guys have been through, you can tell a captivating story about it and then show how A of all, you have attractive traits because of it, but B of all, and perhaps most importantly, you've risen above the adversity that you were struggling against. So let's go over those five again. First of all, provocative statement in the beginning. Secondly, a good versus evil kind of dynamic in your story. And of course, you and her are both on the good side. The third thing is to make her the hero of the story.

14:16 And the easiest way to do that is to relate it to her life and or give her the opportunities to tell stories The next one is to embed high value traits into your stories. The next one is to embed high value traits into your stories. And number five is to show that yes, you went through adversity, but you persevered past it and you are now a stronger man because of it. If you get these five elements into your stories with women, they will get infinitely more attracted to you.

14:51 And not only with women, gentlemen, you should be telling stories to your friends, you should be telling stories at work, you should be telling stories whenever you have to give a public speech, and you should be telling stories in your day-to-day life because this builds rapport. Think about ancient humans around the campfire. What do they talk about? They told stories about the day's hunt. They told stories about a funny situation that happened with Mike the other day at the boulder where the boulder fell on him when he was trying to make a trap for a mammoth elephant and everybody laughs.

15:19 Stories are how humans relate. And if you can learn to tell stories provocatively, interestingly, and to most importantly embed those high value traits and perseverance into it, women are going to get attracted to you. And gentlemen, it gives you so much goddamn content to talk about in the first conversation and first date. I know a lot of you guys struggle with, what do I talk about? If you have five to 10 good stories that you can tell, right there you have probably one to two, maybe even three hours of content that she's going to tell stories to.

15:52 And this is how humans build rapport. So go through your life and think about all the stories of perseverance, stories of funny stories, stories that maybe a girl can relate to because you guys have a common struggle and put those into your conversations with women. One of the best things I suggest is to go through your pictures. We all have smartphones that have literally 70,000 fricking pictures in them. Go through them and say, oh shit, there's a cool story. I'm going to use that in my first conversation.

16:18 Here's another cool story. That's a good first date conversation. Here's an epic story that I can use literally in the first 30 seconds and put those into your conversations with women doing those five things that I spoke about and women will get more attracted to you. Gentlemen, I drop podcasts on Mondays and Thursdays. I do appreciate you listening. Go work on those stories right now, bro. Tendo, you'll be thankful you did. And I will see you in the next episode.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.